Why Do We Blush
Biology 103
2003 First Paper
On Serendip
Why Do We Blush
Maria Scott-Wittenborn
I have blushed easily all my life. I simply accepted it as unavoidable that whenever I spoke in class, arrived somewhere late or was singled out for praise or correction that my face would redden significantly. As a young child I simply assumed that everyone blushed as much as I did, and that it was only my unusually pale skin that made my tendency towards blushing more apparent. But this is not, in fact, the case. Some people blush more than others do and some families blush more than others do (2). Some attribute blushing to social phobia, though it differs in that it is not accompanied by a change in pulse rate or blood pressure (1). Blushing is generally thought to be a response to embarrassment, but is the emotion that triggers blushing as broad and general as "embarrassed"? Or are there more nuances to the emotional cause of what Darwin termed "the most peculiar and most human of all expressions" (2)?
My personal experience is that I tended to blush not exactly when embarrassed per se, but rather whenever I felt I was making, or had made, myself vulnerable to the criticism of others. When something I had done, such as arrive late, broke a social rule. What I could not understand was the purpose blushing served; what use could this phenomenon have? It became clear as I researched the issue that one's propensity for blushing was directly linked to one's sensitivity to the opinion of others (4). However, actual phenomenon of blushing is an appeasement behavior designed to signal to the rest of the group that the individual in question realizes their social transgressions and asks for the group's approval or forgiveness (1). People, like myself who blush frequently, have an oversensitive and therefore inaccurate perception of what constitutes a breach of decorum resulting in more frequent episodes of blushing than someone who did not perceive themselves to frequently commit social transgressions. The source of negative self- attention that results in this need to appease the group and by extension which leads to blushing were divided into categories: threats to public identity, scrutiny and the accusation of blushing (3). All of these result in negative self- attention and the sense that some social norm has been breached, resulting in the perceived necessity for an appeasement behavior, in this case, blushing.
Threats to public identity or a perceived negative reaction of other's often leads to blushing (3). Indeed, many people cited situations in which they have been caught or doing something of which they are ashamed as leading to blushing (3). This is consistent with blushing as an appeasement behavior. The person caught doing something that they perceive to be "shameful" or "improper" would feel the need to signal to the rest of their group that they recognize their transgression. That they reject their actions because they share the values of the groups other members and therefore that the group should accept them despite their mistake (1). Babies, for example, who have no sense of social norms or how they are perceived by others, do not blush at all (2). Blushing increases, though, when strangers witness something that an individual views as unflattering or which puts them in a negative light. For example, when three people together watched a video of one of them singing, the person who had been recorded blushed much more than the strangers (5). I personally remember the torture of being sent to theatre camp and forced to sing at the end of the summer program. The only way that I could get through the song was to stand sideways on the stage looking away from the audience, into the wings. The sight of all the strangers watching me was simply more than I could take.
Scrutiny and receiving large amounts of attention may also lead to blushing even though it may not be negative attention (3). The most obvious example of this being when adolescents of the opposite gender are in one another's presence. This is less a response to a negative reaction on the part of the observer, but rather a fear of insufficiency on the part of the blusher (3). The obvious conclusion to draw from this is that being the center of attention, positive or negative, will lead to a heightened sense of self-awareness. The blusher may feel shame or humiliation if they are the subject of negative attention, for example a publicly chastised student. The blushing would then be intended to apologize, to signal their awareness of the inappropriate nature of their behavior to all who saw it (3). It is a fairly effective way to mitigate further attack, and people tend to see it as a conciliatory gesture (6).
The accusation of blushing has been seen to increase the blusher's state. The inference that 'you are blushing' hence 'you must have done something worth blushing about'. The expectation to blush can become a self-fulfilling prophecy, the same is true of verbal feedback that blushing is in fact taking place. This is due to the fact that a propensity to blush is a serious source of anxiety to an individual who from past experiences expects blushing to take place (7). In general, having one's blush pointed out to a given individual makes them much more socially uncomfortable, though it often seems to be the source of amusement for those who are not blushing (7).
While the exact causes of blushing vary widely from individual to individual, I feel that my own personal experiences with blushing are very much in keeping with the sources three situations conducive to blushing that were discussed above. If blushing is indeed an appeasement behavior, it explains much of why, despite it's apparent lack of use, that it plays a role in our culture. It is an interesting link between one's physical self and one's mental self. What one finds embarrassing or worth apologizing for can be seen in an involuntary physical response.
Sources
1) Stein, D J. Bouwer, C. Blushing and social phobia: a neuroethological speculation. Medical Hypothesis 1997; 49, 101-108.
2) Darwin, C. The Expression of the Emotions in Man and Animals. Chicago:Chicago University Press, 1872/1965.
3) Leary M R, Cutlip W D II, Brit T W, Templeton J L. Social blushing. Psychological Bull 1992; 3: 446-460.
4) Self-conciousness, self-focused attention, blushing propensity and fear of blushing, An article dealing with the the role that self-awareness plays in the cause and frequency of blushing
5) Empathetic Blushing in Friends and Strangers, An article dealing with the issue of blushing out of sympathy or empathy for another
6) Blushing may signify guilt, An article exploring the role that blushing plays in ambiguous situations of guilt or wrong-doing.
7)
The impact of verbal feedback about blushing on social discomfort
and facial blood flow during embarrassing tasks, An article exploring how being made aware of one's blushing tendancies by others affects the individual who is blushing.
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11/04/2005, from a Reader on the Web Hi Serendip, I share the same thoughts as you and Blushing has become nearly a everyday routine to me. I am hindered by the moments that I feel I will blush and when I speak in class thus making me feel out of placed and looked stupid. I really wonder if there is some kind of cure to this?? Regards, Erina
I enjoyed the article. For the past ten years I have been struggling with social anxiety disorder. By facing my fears and continuing to be involved in social interaction, I feel I've made great progress. However, I continue to blush to an extreme. When I blush it often results in facial contortions which are not in the least bit amusing to the people around me. It is unsettling to them and as I observe the look on their faces, it stirs within me a panic attack, making me more nervous. Some people who were once my friends, now seem to go out of their way to avoid me, even certain family members. There are people I feel comfortable around and don't usually blush in their presence. Usually, they are older people, immigrants, or people who also have some sort of an affliction. Also, as I get "use" to people, I seem to not blush. In turn, some people have gotten use to me. Personally, I take my blushing with a grain of salt, but it is difficult for me to enjoy intimacy with any one. I have been divorced for seven years and I would like to start dating again, but I feel my blushing is an obstacle. I seem to no longer have any close friends and this bothers me because I use to have lots. Fortunately, I am a private person and don't let the lack of intimate friends get me down too much. But recently I feel the need to be more socially involved. I have been to councelling. I am not interested in taking medication to control my blushing even if there are drugs that would help. Do you know of any foods that might increase the blushing response - foods that I should avoid? Or, do you know of any foods that might minimize the blushing reflex? I live about 20 miles east of Cleveland. Are there any support groups in this area for people that blush to the extent I do? Also, I would like to volunteer to work with social phobics, not only to help someone else, but I feel this would help me too. Thank you
Thanks for presenting your knowledge on blushing in such an academic and helpful way. I also am a frequent blusher, but never could understand the reason for my problem, because it happens even when I don't feel embarrassed at all! But thanks for your help. Bless you.
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thanks for the informative article, im a blusher, not only when i do wrong things, but also when i laugh when i talk, go into discussion, maybe because i get interested in everything i do, and the things that disturbs me that people immediately point it out saying "oh why your face is red" and that moment just kills... im a kind of a person who can't lie and very honest, whenever i try lying my faces blushes and i get caught, that's really annoying and i think the only way to solve this problem is to mingle and sit in a group and talk to alot of people, but unfortunately, my personality deosn't allow to do that since that i don't like mingling wih people and keep avoiding them, thanx again, we blushers are honest and whenever we see another blusher , we never tell him that his face is red because we know how it feels ... Noureddine, 15 September 2006
I consider blushing on par with a curse!!! Blushing has been my enemy from an extremely young age, which is why I felt the need to respond to this article. The author says "Babies, for example, who have no sense of social norms or how they are perceived by others, do not blush at all." I must dispute that theory. When I was still in diapers (under a year old - since I was potty trained by 1 year old) when my mom would change my diaper if my dad was in the room and made a comment my face would turn red. I, in fact, remember my face feeling very hot. My mother confirms this, saying I would turn red very red - even as a baby. How do you explain that? It was also stated that it is purely a social reaction because it doesn't happen when alone. I beg to differ. Recently I was painting my bedroom - all alone in the house. I realized I had chosen the wrong sheen - semi gloss instead of satin - and I turned totally red! I wasn't embarrassed at all. I simply realized it was the wrong sheen. My face seems to tuen red even when I truly don't feel embarassed. Then it makes me ebarassed because I'm red and people THINK I'm embarrased. Besides a red face, sometimes my neck even turns blotchy red. What other possibliity is there for such blushing, besides social embarrasement? ... Renee R, 20 September 2006
I have had a blushing problem all my life and it generally comes on when I am "on the spot" in a board meeting or being challenged by a colleague on any subject, important or otherwise. It seems to be getting worse as I get older! I am now 57 and feel it could hold me back from the final years of my career and would welcome any thoughts as to how to control it. I doubt I could take medication as I am on blood pressure treatment as it is!! ... John Scott, 9 November 2006
i blush so much! i hate it and i mean that i turn red i get so scared and so then i just want to cry because it is so bad ant i want to now how to make it stop. so plz help me because i want to be able to go up and talk to my class and not turn red and be able to have a boyfriend to without being Red ... Jennifer, 20 November 2006
I to have the case of blushing. I am always worried about what I will do to digger a blush act. I always blush when people look my way or when I am involved in activities such as running. Then I get hot and my face gets really red. Also I used to live in Washington state and only meet one other person at my school who blushed as much as me. Needless to say she and I became close friends. On moving back to Oregon I have meet many people that blush like I do. I will sit in seventh period and see lots of people who have this same problem. I think it is funny because they make fun of people who do it, yet when they are made fun of they...blush. It used to be that I would only like darker boys bacause I didn't want the chance that my kids would have to live with this ... JJ, 12 December 2006
Can anyone explain this situation. When I see a male friend, of whom I am very fond (and I think he is also interested in me), he blushes hopelessly. Is this an indication that he does not like the attention I give him, or is his blushing a sign that he feels inferior and is unable to express his feelings? ... Elizabeth Lilley, 13 April 2007
My problem has to a very huge degree spoiled my life. I have withdrawn from everything there was to enjoy in life. I even blush when I'm alone. I simply dread it. I know I've been talked about a lot. I have let friends drift from me and my family. I have lost jobs - one particular one 13 years ago I still think about with total horror. I have been described as different = (this is a word they use for people with problems like this in the Health Authority). I have heard a boss say that my problem was very disconcerting.
I would love to have had a life free of blushing. It is very controlling in that I have no control over it. I know other people are like me but I have never met anyone. I have read about operations but they are so expensive. The Highfield Hospital in London perform them ... Brenda Sheffield, 13 May 2007
Hi. Thank you very much for your very informative, as well as sensitive, posting on the subject of blushing. I discovered your site as I searched for links related to allergic reactions related to alcohol with skin flushing. Your posting has been particularly helpful as I have considered the relationship between blushing and the "allegic" response, which I believe in both case are nothing more than conditioned reactions within the mind and have nothing to do with the body, at the causal level, at all. Your posting has enabled me to form some potential emotional links to my "allergic reaction", as I realize it occurred when I was dealing with some thoughts steeped in inferiority and littleness along with some memories of a situation where I perceived judgment. Thank you for helping me better understand the cause, at its true source, of my reaction and how it is so closely attuned to the condition which to most sounds indeed more benign of blushing. This has helped remove the fear I had tagged to my experience. Now may we all realize the truth of who we really are, at one with each other, far beyond any reactions of either grandiosity OR littleness, and may we rest in the love of that union. Thank you! ... Mary, 21 May 2007
wow, you are an amazing writer, i must say i really enjoyed the article/paper.
i have struggled with this myself, but it started when i was around 15 years old, or at least it was then when i became aware of it. when ever i had to stand up to speak in class, etc (the other things you pointed out your self in the article) i will blush to a point that even my eyes will water, im 24 now and in vet-college and still got the problem, smaller crouds might not get me to blush though. i related a lot to one of the persons comments here, where he explained he used to have many friends and very sociable, till developing social fobia, hardly having any friends anymore. im going through that myself.
it was comforting to read about other peoples expierences related to this, i had never heard about other cases before, any advice is welcome! thanks for sharing ... Christian, 25 June 2007
The article and comments on blushing are very interesting. I'm 51 and I've blushed forever. I HATE IT, but I don't let it hinder me. I can think about a particular thing and I'll blush when I'm all alone - go figure! I've always tried to deny the fact that I'm timid because I see it as weakness, but the fact is, I don't like attention drawn to me. But I've had a very successful career in the corporate world and now I've switched gears to go into counseling. I hope my blushing doesn't make people feel uncomfortable, because I'm actually fine - I just have a bright red face -- which I guess could be pretty cool at Christmas! ... Reader on the web, 7 December 2007
Im a guy and I blush whenever
Im a guy and I blush whenever someone is looking or talking to me. except for my close friends. unlless I do something stupid like crack or somthing. but whenever a girl catches me looking at her I blush alot and start to crack. It sucks. my peers say most of the time Im really quiet and shy... buy Ive beat up 3 people so... I think I might have social anxiety disoder or whatever. It sucks.
blushing
i seen on websites that hemorrhoid cream stops blushing i haven't try it but Google it. supposedly shrinks the cell that makes you go bright red. im about to go to high school this august and i been blushing since about 6 months it feels horrible seing people laughin at you but you have to stay srong and accept how God made you .
Blushing!
i am 14 and i blush ALL THE TIME! and just like many people have said, for no reason because most of the time i'm not embarrassed at all. i think that getting red in the face should not control my life, but sometimes i cant help it. i love to talk and make people laugh, but i have stopped speaking out in class and that, because i know i will blush. i blush especially hard when i am singled out and that is sometimes often because i find most of my classes really boring and i love to chat with people so my teachers always call on me and tell me to be quiet and ask me a really hard question or something and that really fires my face up. and when i am embarrassed and flustered my head pounds and my face burns and i cant think straight becuase i am too worried about how i look so of course i can never answer the question correctly, which gets me even redder because im wrong. i think this is a really big problem but i am so happy and thankful that i now know that there are many other people suffering from the same thing because i don't know anybody who blushes as much as i do. i also have extreamly fair skin which of course makes the problem even worse. i rarely answer or ask questions in class because i know i will flare. last year i went to a dermatologist and she said that i have light rosacea and thats why my face flares often, but then i went to a different one this year and he said that i dont have rosacea but that i am just a flushy blushy.
i really wish there were some kind of food or natural remedies or even pills that could help and reduce redness. if anyone knows of any, that would be greatly appreciated.
p.s this article has also really helped me understand and learn
thnx!
A solution for fair skin.
Hi,
I've commented on this post before with the same problem. I'm 18 now and still blush all the time. Most of my situations are the same yours but I also go red from over exertion i.e. exercise.
I am glad to say I have found a solution. I too have fair skin, quite ivory in colour so redness really shows. I found in most pharmacies, a concealer, it is green in colour and is meant for covering spots. It's really cheap and I often put cream on my cheeks, as that is where it blazes red the most, first to stop my skin drying out and then I rub the green in on top until I am satisfied with the colouring. It does make me seem very pale but I am anyway, I always put a light powder on top to match my normal skin tone. I cleanse it off my face everyday so that it doesn't block my pores. I have found when my friend tried it that it really doesn't work on tanned or olive skin. So if you do try it you should let me know how it works out for you.
Hope I could help.
Alice
*sigh*
I despise blushing! I get all red when I'm nervous. It's crazy. If someone accused me for something, even if it wasn't true, my face would be boiling red. It's terrible... And when I just see my crush I can feel the temperature rising in my face. *sigh*. Life is hard when it doesn't go your way...
Going red isn't a big deal! Really!
I'm a 28 year old guy, and I get embarrassed and go red much more often than I want to. I have always done so since I was in my teens. I remember when I was about 16 and my school mates in maths class would just need to say something like "girls" to me, and I'd go red! Funny thing is that since then I've come out as gay, but anyway.
Today I went red because a work colleague told someone else that I'm like a bottomless pit when it comes to eating cakes. Someone had suggested to bring in a cake in for the staff. I thought to myself, previous to the red moment, during the conversation about cakes, that if my work colleague says something to me I'll get embarrassed. When I did, she pointed it out. I laughed and ran off.
It's so silly sometimes... I can be by myself and remember an embarrassing moment and go red, even though I'm by myself.
I find it difficult to speak in public or groups, and I'm almost guaranteed to go red.
My point is this: If you go red, so what?! It's who you are, and maybe a problem to you, as it is me, but you shouldn't avoid situations that make you go red. In many cases, the more you experience these difficult situations, where you might get embarrassed, the more comfortable you will become with these situations, and the less likely you are to become embarrassed.
I'm going to try a few of the simple techniques I've read online to see if I can control these moments, but at the moment, it seems I just need to accept that I will react that way, while I continue to try and experience the social interaction that is the trigger much of the time.
The next time someone points out to me that I've blushed, I'll stand there and say, I know, no need to remind me, I'm just having a hot flush or so, and forget my redness and continue on with the conversation or whatever I was doing.
Above all, all that happens is that you get a red face and feel a lot funny, but it's not the end of the world, and at least it shows people that you are a sensitive and thoughtful person, which is a trait that many lack. Don't let it ruin your life.
Grounds for losing your job?
I feel that someday I might lose my job over my occasional instant blushing. I know co-workers & managers have talked about it. Makes for good gossip.
What I think
I'm 16 male, and as you may have guessed I have said issue. Any time anyone who is not a close friend or family (and even sometimes family) talks to me I do said thing.
But all the ppl here seem to want to get rid of it. Ya its annoying and totally destroys my social life, because people get uncomfortable with it after a while, but well its one of those things that makes me me.
Ya Id like to control it more, but I'm proud to blush.
I turn red... I'm not OK with it.
I am 12 years old, but I look like I am 16 or 17. I am actually 5'8 and people always think I'm older than I am. Yepp, that's one way I blush. Being notcied for my hair, skin, height, weight, e.t.c. alwyas maked me blush/embarrased. Like any other young girl, I have crushes on boys. One day, I accidently slammed the door on this really cute 17 year old boy's face. I sat down next to a teacher and she asked "Jenna, why are you so red? You are like a tomato!!" and I come up with a retarted excuse. So I blush in front of EVERY SINGLE boy I have a crush on!! I am part italian, part scottish, part british, and a little bit of cherokee. I have very interesting skin, it's very fair, and red splotches (not apart of the blushing sequence) on my arms and legs. Since I am part cherokee and italian, you may think I would be tan, but I am also part british and scottish, so instead I have red and fair skin. Anyways, I blush everytime I get infront of my class, or become noticed with people I don't want to be noticed with. I turn red whenever I get accused of stuff, and I turn red whenever I play sports or get sweaty. There are all of these pretty girls that don't turn red. Whenever I am sweaty, I always get noticed for being red. I hear I inherite that trait and God made me that way, so I just have to learn to accept it. And I feel comfortable about talking to all of you about it. Thank you xoxo
i am 15. i blush all the
i am 15. i blush all the time. i am a straight a student but i am always scared to raise my hand or talk in class because i know my face will turn red. this didnt start until the 6th grade when i moved to a new town. one time i was at church and an older man wh is a family friend always jokes around. he said something to me and even though i wasnt embarrassed i became nervous and that set my face off. he called me out and was like i didnt mean to make you blush and then called my dad over there because he thought it was funny. another time my favorite teacher asked me where i went over spring break and my face was so red and hot i thought i was on fire. when ever someone who isnt my friend or family talks to me i turn red. even at stores. i hate it so much. i wonder if there is a treatment. i want to go see a dermatologists but i dont know how to ask my mom. i cant live my life.
To Meredith
Hi Meredith,
Was happy to hear you attend church. I'm a believer myself. Well I can't give you any wonder cure. Just advise. It's really important that you talk with your parents about it so that they can know you are struggling with it. Then it also becomes your joined fight and not just your own thing to carry around. Your parents are really the best to talk to. If you don't have a good relationship with them, try grandparents, aunts or other close ones that you have an idea would understand you.
Trust in God, share with Him your burdens and lay them out. Be patient. Hang out with people you trust and that have a good influence (maybe from church?), then you can relax in their company and learn to handle the blushing. It might never go all away, but it might fade as you learn to handle situations.
When I was a 15 I got red when just a girl looked at me. Now I only get red when something really embarassing happens or if someone make fun of me. We're all in a process - have hope!
I will pray for you
Jonas from Europe
Neck blushing
I have not been a life-long blusher, but I've only been neck-blushing in the past four years. When someone points it out to me, I just smile and say that its hot flashes from menopause - but only because I have no other explanation for it. I am completely self-confident, but when I'm under a bit of stress then it appears and I really don't know if anything can be done for it.
reduce the blush
i blush all the time...cant get enough of it, its so obvious that my face is on fire and i am uncomfortable in a particular situation...everyone notices...BUT my question to you fellow red faces, is:
what colours do you suggest will reduce my rubyness? as white is clearly out of the window? as it makes me shine like a becon, any suggestions to dull down the blush would be appriciated!!! thanks Ellen x
Hello Ellen
Green is the anti of red. It should help.
Haha what's up with that. Makeup tips coming from a guy !
However I knew a girl who have a reddish face and always used so much makeup. I hope you will not do the same. I would really prefer her with normal colour and then blush once in a while instead of looking all artificial with all that makeup.
An advise is do try to work on it by being together with ppl you feel comfortable with and then try to face your fears slowly.
Best wishes
Jonas
Helpful tip?
I suppose that I ended up on this page the same way we all did: googled for help or, even better, a cure for blushing. Like me, you probably also found some comfort in knowing this problem is not as limited to yourself as you thought and that the reasons and symptoms are similar in most cases.
I did notice too that a lot of people have mentioned it happened in class and I can't help but draw the conclusion that we must all feel more vulnerable than normal when we are in a situation where we are learning, as if we expect ourselves to know everything instinctively.
I haven't read all the replies so I hope I am not repeating what has already been said but a revealing point that was brought up by Serendip is that blushing is a reaction to a somewhat misappropriate behaviour, justified or not, conscious or not, felt by the person blushing. Since, as Serendip mentioned, young children do not blush because they haven't learned "proper social behaviour" yet, it seems obvious that we have also "learned" to blush. Actually, a more accurate way to describe it is that we have been "programmed" to react in such a way.
I am just back from class where, of course, I'm sure I could have lit the whole room red if someone had dimmed the lights but, I don't know if this was a subtle way for the teacher to address what he had just witnessed but he started talking about Neuro-linguistic programming which is the second thing I googled when I got home. I am now pretty convinced that the key to curing blushing is to reprogram our brains probably by understanding the original events that caused us to develop this reflex. So, this journey starts right here and now for me. I would love to hear from fellow blushers to share, learn from you and know what you think about NLP.
I'll be looking forward to read your posts or better yet, feel free to write me directly at raymond.rocan@gmail.com
Raymond
Always Going Red..... Ruining My Life.
Hey i too am a blusher. It is ruining my life and i try to tell myself that it shouldnt but it does! I HATE being asked a question in class as i cant even think about what the teacher has just asked me as i am too busy worrying about how red i am going and what everyone will think of me! I am also terrified of making a fool of myself for some reason? My worst nightmare though, would have to be doing talks infront of my class in english, as soon as i am at the front of the classroom, and i see all those faces looking at me, i go soo red! and this ruins my whole talk as me blushing is all i am thinking about. I sometimes have to not do things or skive school as i know there is no point in me doing them as i would just BLUSH. I am not at all shy though, just really self-consious, if that makes any sense? I am still at academy and 14 years old. I ENVY people who do not ever go red and feel so annoyed how they call me names like 'usher blusher' etc. but i cant do it back to them as they never blush! I also feel like people are always looking at me and this makes me start to panic incase something is wrong, or they have heard something bad about me, i have such a lovely life at home and have friends but i just feel that if this HUGE problem in my life is gone, then i will feel much happier with myself. Your blog is really good though, as i was reading it, i found my head nodding, so that must be a good sign. Thank you x
Blushing..
I used to blush more than I do know when I was a child than i do now, though it's still frequent. I feel the heat on my cheeks and ears; usually a response to constructive criticism. I recently started taking piano lessons and that involves performing in front of my high school class. I blush every time, but I'm learning to control it. Usually, I'm so nervous that my hands are cold and clammy enough to rest on my cheeks and cool my face down. That Usually works for me.
Hi,my name is Ashley,I'm
Hi,my name is Ashley,I'm 19,and I too have suffered from this unexplained blushing.Only,when I blush people sometimes say,"you have the rosiest cheeks,I wish I were like you and didn't have to apply any blush." Other times(with people I don't know)they say,"Wow,why are you so red?!Or"You're as red as a tomato!" When it's occurred with the people who think I just have really rosy cheeks,it almost hurts more than the people who dislike it,because it's almost as if they're saying that they like a disease and wish they had it too.What they don't know is that it's painful,it burns,makes you self concious and really nervous.
Well,I once considered myself to be a fairly outgoing,confident,talkative person,and had many friends.Once the anxiety attacks,nervousness and redness occured,it was as if all of that just dissappeared and I wasn't myself after that;it made me timid,more quiet,and lose my best friends.It came to the point where I couldn't bare being in a public highschool anymore because as soon as I got off gym after running or swimming,I would look in the mirror and see a bright red face.Also whenever I was near a cute boy or had to talk in front of any group of people,it would almost be like a switch automatically turned it on.That was the embarrassing part,people noticing.Other than that,I didn't have a reason to blush,yet I still felt nervous and bright red.My other symptoms included my heart pounding fast,my temperature rising,and me sweating a lot.Any stressful or physical situation would make me feel that way it seemed.
My very light complexion has been no help to hide it either,I even grew a hatred towards my light skin because the redness would be so apparent and make things worse.So I decided to look for good make up like liquid foundation and facial powder to cover it up.The powder didn't work well on its own,the red would show right through.However,the foundation actually was a big help,it sort of served as a mask and made me feel more comfortable and less worried of blushing.The thing is,I still have the nervousness, which to a lot of people,is very noticable.
It recently got to the point to where I would avoid most social situations at all costs,I would even lie and say that I was sick or had to take a shower or something;I would say anything to avoid feeling that pain where I would end up squirming in my own skin.
The mall is a big thing for me;the thought of seeing someone I know was unbearable.And the large crowds which you have to walk in front of like in the foodcourt,is plain torturous.
I've actually done an okay job of hiding it from my family though(not that I'm proud of it).Mostly by covering it up,or avoiding bright light and hot temperatures which seem to trigger it.Although when they have noticed,I've been asked why I get sooooo red by them,and I can't tell you how annoying that is,especially because I don't know for sure why.
I'm no doctor or intellectual,but my theory is that it's caused or triggered by something emotional or traumatic.For me,it just so happened to occur right after my parents got divorced.After that I was really depressed,had major anxiety,and then it later sort of manifested as the redness,etc...
What I think is that maybe the brain triggers the symptoms when we're in situations that are uncomfortable in our minds,because the body has been through emotional turmoil in the past.Maybe our emotions and/or nerves are somehow overly sensitive,causing the body stress that makes us nervous and creates the burning sensation,redness,etc. we've felt.
Anyways,on another note I just have to say,before visiting this site,I never realized that I wasn't alone in my misery.And you know what they say"misery loves company".That's so true,it gave me a sense of belonging,atleast in the sense that we're all in the same boat.I can really relate to all of you in some way,it's nice to know there are actually people out there like me.I just wonder why it's never really talked about;maybe becaused the people experiencing it are too embarrassed to talk or do anything about it,I wouldn't be surprised.I just hope and pray that there's a cure for it soon.
I just hope none of us stop living our lives because of it though.We should all instead support each other and help one another conquer our fears.I truly don't believe it's something we should have to live with,if it's triggered in our minds,I say it's beatable.
May God bless and help each and every one of you who have suffered through this as well.Don't give up,and remember,you're not alone.
tired
your response really touched me because when i was reading it I really felt you're emotion and can relate. This whole "blushing" thing has become a daily battle for me. Every time I go somewhere or talk to someone i have to prepare my self and it is getting so exhausting..I just want to be normal, and everytime i blush i want to beat myself up! If it is triggered from our emotions, then why isnt it easier to stop it. Why is that even though i tell myself it will b ok, only god can jugde u and all of us "people" are equal and i tell myself that I'm no different, that i still blush. This illness is hindering my life terribly. I try to keep moving on but the more i realize that I have to even deal with it in the first place makes me even more depressed, why me..? Why us? I could see if it was just an occasional blush , but this thing is draining the life out of me, it seems to be getting worse as i am getting older, Im also 19 and I am so scared of blushing in front of others I am too scared to even apply for a job because I want to avoid the interview. I don't want to live like this anymore, I want to be comfortable in my own skin. I an enviouse of those who are. But i'm gonna keep praying to god that this be taken away from me so that I can live my life in confidence and joy..but until then , good luck to everyone and god bless! dont give up, because once u do this thing will consume u .
i've got to the point where i don't want to go on!
I have been sat here reading every ones story and i realised im nodding my head...i can relate to every thing being said.
I have been aflicted by this cruel curse for 12yrs, I had an operation to cure it 2yrs ago the operation nrealy killed me! but for 6 months i was blush free i didn't even get the anxiety, incresed heart rate or facial burning...i felt so alive...i did things i would never do, i taught a pole dance class of 7 for 3 months i stood infront of these people and it felt great...but it was all taken away from me in the blink of an eye...i have been getting worse over the past few months...i avoid going to shops, seeing friends, family and i even panic about seeing my partner..this is a cruel curse and i have been praying for more than half my life to be normal...there just doesn't seem to be any hope...an operation didn't cure me, wearing fake tan and foundation can't hide it... i had to move back to my parents because i couldn't work, i have no money and i feel like my life is not worth living if i have to suffer any more with this blushing! god i wish there was some thing out there to help us!!!!!
Blush reflex
Started in High School as a Junior. Joel, a Senior and on the football team, knew I blushed easily. He would simply look at me and say, "Harold, you are blushing." Even though I wasn't blushing at that time I immediately lit up like a Christmas tree. I suppose I have some social insecurities that contribute to this curse. I'm now 58 and I still blush quite easily. Does chronic blushing lead to Rosacea??? Even with this ailment I managed to have a successful career wth the Navy and I presently teach public school. I try to live by this simple philosophy; Do not worry about things you have control of and do not worry about the things you do not have control of.
HK
Life is hard (male 19)
Its interesting how we have all come together threw searching on the internet lol.
>>> I feel that I have a split personality. One side of me is a confident 19 year old student who is active and outgoing, the other is an emotionally insecure and troubled person. I always feel that I go BRIGHT RED at random times, merely because i think to myself...yep you go red in these situations...and its tough. There are people who say 'Who cares what they think man?'...and I dont...I DO NOT CARE...I care about my face going red in situations. ITS A VICIOUS PSYCHOLOGICAL CYCLE...the fear of going red.
I wish I could wear a mask to cover my stupid face.
I think we should all move to our own desert island, funny thing is...I don't think we would go red.
To anyone thats reading this,I think we are all going to waste our lives away by trying to find a cure for this...lifes too short.
The next time anyone feels a RED FACE coming on, RUN :p
Peace out x
blush
im 15years old and im blushing very much to you know from a idea to stop blushing any pill or any thing.thanks
going red! grrrrr.
hey! its just started to happen since i started high school! in class when the teacher talks to me my face turns red! my best friend is the same too and goes red! but not as much as me! it makes me really upset and sometimes i try and avoid going to school because of it! sometimes when i get really nervous i start to stutter badly, and sometimes a panic attack. it sucks! whenever someone says 'katie, why do you always go red?' it makes me go soo red and i feel like crying! it doesnt happen when im with family. gosh i wish their was a cure
blushing
Good grief! i'm home sick today and just read all of these postings. Just want to say that I am 53 and have always been a "blusher." But reading these makes me realize that my blushing really has diminished over the years... public school and my early adulthood years were the worst. Since then I've managed to make it through school for x-ray tech. and have worked at that for 13 years - I do sometimes blush in social situations and still in classes when doing presentations (I'm working on a BA degree for social work) - I have tried taking Inderal (10mg) before a presentation and it worked to some degree - made me feel dopey though and like someone else said "stoned" and not really that good (I really don't want to have to take anything or have any surgeries!)
But it was very interesting reading everyone's stories - I'd say just accept and love yourself for who you are ...I think growing and working at something outside of yourself and knowing that you are a good person will help ... but of course, if you find a sure cure, let me know! ;-)
red neck and face
I have been blushing since I can remember. It first started with just a quick blush on my face only with I was a little girl. My family made fun of me a lot for what ever reason, and because of that I lost some confidence. It started to get worse after I got married. It started as blushing on my chest and neck area, which could last for several hours!!! They were little and only a few people would see and make comments. I did not know what was happening so I just brushed it off. Soon after, I passed my nursing boards and was working for a major hospital with oncology patients. My first emergency on the hospital floor I walked out with a blushing chest, neck and face. Again it lasted for several hours and I was really hot. Because of that, I was more aware of the blushing and I started to blush more often. Sometime I would blush for no reason, or I was under some type of stress, or felt stupid. When people started to make comments it ALWAYS made it worse. It started to control my life and I would shy away from doing certin tasks at work because it would make me blush. These were skills that I loved to do in nursing school and I did a very good job at it. I would also not go to outings if it was to hot or if I where nervous. So about 2 and 1/2 yrs ago I had the surgery that cuts the nerve that controls the blushing. It did help the blushing for no reason, but now I am told by a Dermatologist that I do have Rosacea that was caused by the excessive blushing. The surgery did not help the blushing that happens when I am nervous. Just this last week, I met with my boss (she scares me, there is something about her I am not confortable with, people have never scared me like she does) and I go soooo nervous that I ended up blushing for most of the 2 hr meeting. It started on my chest and moved to my face. The blushing lasted about an hour afterwards. Just thought I wanted to share, I always felt I was the only one. Good luck to all of you fellow blushers, try to not be so hard on yourself!!!
neck blushing, its really horrible!
Has anyone had problems with your neck blushing? I mean blotchy really red blotches! When I get nervous, excited or when people get confrontational with me (I work in the public). When speaking in meetings or meeting with new clients sometimes, my neck breaks out in red blotches. As just as face blushing, when they say "whats wrong with your neck?" I get redder & it takes a long time to go away, sometimes 10-15 minutes! I want to wear a turtle neck every day, just in case, but I hate turtle necks.
Neck blushing
Yes, that happens to me all the time! And it looks horrible!
i have the exact same
i have the exact same problem, it fully sux and i dont really know anyone else that gets it. When i drink alcohol, or get embarrased or nervous i go so red especially on my neck, chest and cheeks. Is there any possible cure??? I often have to have cold showers. :(
Maybe this helps?.....I cant live life like this.
i dont have a cure, but i've started taking rescue remedy tablets which seem to be helping with hypersensativity, and i'm really happy.... they've been helping so much at school. they make me a bit sleepy and i take way too many a day (i take two at the beginning of every lesson. lessons are 45 mins and there are 7 in a school day. oops....) but there aren't any real side effects or overdose risks. i'm 16 and have just started blushing excessively at the beggining of grade eleven. i have no idea what triggered it or why it started suddenly. it kind of happened like this: i was at a friends house, and i walked into the lounge where a guy was sitting on the couch, and the minute he looked at me i went red. then he commented on it and it obviously became horribly worse.
then over the course of the next few days i kept getting into embarrassing situations which made me blush naturally, situatuions in which anyone would blush. but the frequency of all those blushing incidents in such a short time period seemed to scar me for life, and from then on i've been blushing so easily its scary.
the worst must have been when the class clown, came up to me and started being all seductive, just as a joke. i was laughing so much but then i went red. and everyone was like oooh, she likes him, shes going so red! etc. it was humiliating.
its so horrible to get hot and flustered all the time. not only is it embarrassing, its physically uncomfortable. you sweat, your head pounds, you get so hot, plus you have to deal with all the stress, worry and embarrassment.
but sometimes, to me, it feels really good. i know that sounds weird, but if i didn't look red, i would enjoy the feeling. it sends like a wave of heat through through me and a sort of numbness, and tingles through your body to your toes. its quite amazing.
anyway now i'm rambling on. i just didn't want to repeat the same damn things everyone else is saying. although i will say this, its incredible to find so many people like this, who have been so affected and stressed by it that they went on the internet to find some help.
its such an issue for me that it has lead me to love alcohol, and be very dependant on it. its the most effective cure i've found, one drink and i can say anything without going red. i know its bad but i love alcohol. its my savior, along with these rescue pills (BY THE WAY I'VE FOUND THAT THE PILLS ARE MORE EFFECTIVE THEN THE DROPS- dissolve them under your tongue, and they don't taste foul. but they also don't taste so good that you're tempted to eat them like sweets, which is good because i have a real sweet tooth!)
it also lead to cutting.....i used to get so angry at myself that i'd want to hurt myself. why was my body doing this to me? it was sabotaging me. my mind said i was calm and relaxed but my skin told another story. so i would cut myself. i broke apart one of those disposable razors, took out one of the two blades, and made long, shallow (i couldn't handle deep)cuts along my ankles ( i tried my wrists before but i was tired of hiding them all the time, it was way too visible and easily spotted.)
But i've stopped that now. i'm blessed to have very good looks (i've got that sort of very cute, pretty girl look, or so i've been told) so my blushing is "cute".....however infuriating it is to me. its nice to know that people dont see me as a weird freak, or that my blushing makes people avoid me etc.
ANYWAY. who knew i had so much to say (i'm not one to waste my breath, i'm shy and not talkative at all) but i could honestly go on for days on this topic. good luck to all you blushers, i'm hoping it'll be something i grow out of, if not i'm going to have that operation with the blood vessel, or get hypnosis. i can't live life like this.
be sure to buy some rescue tablets though, about R66.00 a bottle. hopefully they work for you too.
XOXO
Watch out to try to remove
Watch out to try to remove the symphtons instead of dealing with the reasons behind...
No more rings around the rosie
Hey guys, when I was in high school around the 9th grade, I used to have this same problem. Even when someone would look at me in class I would turn bright red. I would then try to hide it by putting my head down on the desk or pretending to dig through my bag. But it would just get worse. I think sometimes this has to do with adolesense because I am 25 now and rarely will I blush. But when I do, I act like its not a big deal, if I'm with people I will say things like "I have no idea why I'm blushing", because usually I am truly not embarased but blush for no reason. Blushing is natural, you must re-wire your brain to think that its not a big deal. The more you think of it as not a big deal, the less you will blush.
Haha,I'm a 17 year old girl
Haha,I'm a 17 year old girl and I think it's so cool to see people with the same problems. Honestly, there are points in time where I'd forget that I have a problem with blushing and I'll stop for a bit. But then once something triggers the blush again, I'd start this whole chain of blushing for about a month. I find that if I don't think too hard about blushing, it won't happen as often, but it's sooo hard.
Something that helps me calm down is that if I just announce lightheartedly, "Yeah, I know I'm blushing, okay?" or something along those lines. Then generally, they just ignore it, it peaks, and then I'm calm again.
However, for social interaction in public like with cashiers or asking for help, I still sweat/blush like crazy at times and need help overcoming it. It seems that the more I expose myself to it, the more I worry over it, no matter how much I say to myself that it's no big deal.
i'm so glad to found that
i'm so glad to found that lot's of people actually experiencing it too. i thought i was weird coz i don't see many people blushing in my whole life. i'm 24 and my friends still making fun of me and intentionally making me blush "oh here it comes here it comes!! the blush!" i wasn't blushing until they said that exact lines. really..
i remember i was in a meeting of a project in my office.. n one of the manager told me that he's going to take me out in front other managers n staffs (he's married and have children)!! geez!!! n he said to the other manager "hey hey look she's blushing!". n they both laughed at me! it's very very uncomfortable for me. but they think that it's cute. *doh*
seems like i'll get this kind of treatment everywhere if i can't control my blushing meter...
Blushing
I am 13 and am in my last year of middle school and i have blushed every since last year. I hate blushing!I blush when people stare at me,talk to me (if their not my close friends),get confused when i try to explain something,dont hear me,point out when im blushing...( it goes on )I simply hate it!I always think that people think im stupid or werid... (The doctor said i might have social anxiety)I cant control it and want to get rid of it!Is there a Cure?
Extreme Blushing
It really makes me feel a little better knowing that I'm not the only person out there that blushes over everything. I wish I didn't have to live like this, but there's nothing I can do. I blush over nothing, and blush over everything. I go to the store and make my bf pay, because I know I will turn bright red when paying just because I feel like I'm being stared down or judged. I love going to the mall, but I'm always cautious with the fear I'm going to run into someone I know and embaress myself. I can't say hi to someone I haven't seen in a long time, I have to avoid them so I don't look like a fool. I'll walk down the street and my boyfriend or cousin will joke or say something to me and they'll laugh at me if I turn bright red. And it's not just my face, my ears, my neck, my arms and chest all turn as red as a tomato. I currently don't have my license and am scared to drive because I'm afraid if I'm driving my face will turn red, and my mind will go blank because I can't hide it, that I'll cause an accident because I don't have a clear mind. If I talk to people and I feel like there's a bunch of people staring at me, I kind of panic internally, which shows externally on my face. I can't hide anything or have any secrets. I tried hiding it from my bf, which he still doesn't know how bad it hurts me. One time he was here and his sister stopped by my apt. building because his other sister lives next door to me, and he wanted to introduce me to her. As soon as I saw them walking towards me I started burning up and I shook her hand and just turned around akwardly pretending to look for something on the ground until she walked away. Later I had to relive the embaressment when my bf reminded me of how red i was and that he had to make an excuse and say i was really shy to her. She probably thinks I'm a freak. And all through school someone would talk to me, and if i knew other people were looking at me while i talked, I would turn red and then theyd be like omg why is your face so red. I wish I knew myself, but life is so difficult. Life is short and I feel like I'm holding back from so much in life. I don't even have a job right now because I don't want to have one where I deal face to face with people like as a waitress or a cashier at a store. Especially if I see someone I know. If anyone knows anything I can do to stop this, please help. Thanks for listening.
You're gonna be ok.
Dear Ashley,
I too used to have this problem in school. I would turn bright red and try to hide my face by laying my head down on the desk or pretending I was digging in my bag for something. I know how bad it hurts and how the fear can grip you. What you are going to have to do, is just accept it. When you truely accept it it will begin to happen less often. The next time you blush around someone, no matter how bad it hurts just keep on talking like normal. If they say something about it, just make a comment like "I know I'm blushing, I have no idea why". This will begin to calm you and help you to accept yourself for who you are. Blushing is not a bad thing, it just has to do with your blood vessels and yours respond more sensitively. People are not thinking your stupid, or a freak. Most of the time people are just thinking of themselves anyway. You can get through this. It will go away, as soon as you accept it.
blushing hate it
Thanks for your advice its made me feel alot better aboyt my self but still dont think it will go away
Thank you so much for your
Thank you so much for your encouragement. It means so much to know that I am not the only one going through this and other people know how i feel. I've been having trouble accepting my problem, and now i know there is hope.
blushing
I am 47 and have blushed since I was very young 5-6. It is uncomfortable yes, but what can u do? Quit life or blush; I choose to blush and live life, sometimes my friends say things, but for the most part they just accept it. Matter of fact I think I am probably blushing at writing this.
I am a cop and get put in very uncomfortable public situations, where a red rose has nothing on me, but i continue to do my job and live. I don't hide. I tell my friends I have 2 colors white and red and if you don't like one, wait a second and it will turn again.
I am very white and don't tan, but instead have a redskin look as long as I am in the sun, but if i stay out of the sun I turn white again very quickly.
I am sensitive to what people say to me or around me, but I don't think that I am insecure.
On the lighter side one of my lady friends said she thinks it sexy. So there it is life for us all.
Your Red brother
UGH... Blushing
Wow, this article really opened my eyes!! i wish there was a cure for blushing though. I've had an issue with blushing long as i can remember. It's soo embarrasing and i have the biggest fear that someone will point it out to me or make fun of me. Because when they do, i get even redder. how pitiful, it really is. That feeling i get in my cheeks. it feels like they're on fire, burning up, and i can feel the blush coming on. I am a really outgoing person, not shy at all! I love talking to people and doing public presentations. But maybe i'm just really insecure about myself? i don't really know. It seems i blush when i'm talking to a really cute guy, when i get stressed out, or even when i'm just having a laugh with my friends or talking on the phone! You could read me like a book too.. when i lie, my face gets beat-red. Or when i'm nervous, anxious, embarrased, scared, hot, thoughtful. There's never a day i go without blushing.
I hate it sooooooo much!!!! I've gotten to a point where i try and cover up my cheeks with concealer, just to reduce the 'look'.
It's bad. :(
ITS REALLY GOOD TO KNOW THAT
ITS REALLY GOOD TO KNOW THAT IM NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO HAS THIS PROBLEM.I'M 23 YEARS OLD AND BLUSHED EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE SINCE BEING 8 YEARS OLD.SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE I CANT FACE THE WORLD BECAUSE IT MAKES ME FEEL SO UNCOMFATABLE TALKING TO ANYONE OR EVEN JUST WALKING DOWN THE STREET OR GOING TO THE CORNER SHOP.NOBODY UNDERSTANDS UNLESS THEY HAVE THIS PROBLEM THEMSELVES AND THATS WHY ITS SO FRUSTRATING BECAUSE NO ONE I KNOW HAS THIS PROBLEM.I CRY ABOUT IT ALOT AND HAVE FOUND THAT THE ONLY THING I CAN DO TO GET A LITTLE BIT OF CONFIDENCE WHEN BEING IN SOCIAL SITUATIONS IS TO DRINK ALCOHOL.IV'E BEEN YO HYPNOTHERPY AND THAT DIDNT WORK,IVE BEEN ON ANTI-ANXIETY DRUGS BUT THEY DONT WORK.I LEAVE ALL MY JOBS BECAUSE OF THIS AND IT MAKES PEOPLE THINK IM LAZY BUT IM NOT IM JUST SCARED AND FEEL LIKE HIDING AWAY FROM EVERYONE.I SOMETIMES WISH EVERYONE WAS BLIND SO THEY WOULDT NOTICE ME GOING RED ALL THE TIME.I FEEL LIKE IF THERE IS NO CURE THEN I SEE MY LIFE BEING ISOLATED AND UPSETTING TILL THE DAY I DIE.IF ANYONE CAN HELP ME PLEASE LET ME KNOW.
Blushing
I blush for any reason, and i have had thoughts of ending my life, because i cant see much point anymore, its really took hold of my entire life, im so uncomfortable all the time, everytime it happens which is all the time i lose control of what im talking about and end up talking nonsence and making myself look even more stupid. People jokingly call me boring now bcos if i start telling a joke then i go bright red and then forget the ending, my blushing holds me back on everything, i avoid all situations because of this. I dont want to sit at home on my own forever. I really want to have that operation even if it doesnt work, i think its worth a try, afterall considering how i am feeling now i think its worth the risk. Its an awful feeling when you feel your face and neck and chest go bright red. You just want the ground to swallow you up and hide you away and you feel like you cant talk to that person again now because they are waiting for you to blush, these storys are no good to me saying just ignore it, or its cute etc they dont help me at all. Basically i want to end my blushing and would really just like to hear from people who has found the answer tothis. THANK YOU.
Blushing at the age of 34
I have recently started blushing even in the presence of friends that I am very comfortable with and know them for many years now. Ive also noticed that normal subjects make me blush. What upsets me further is that I never used to have this problem, in fact, Im out going, most of the times centre of attention, and usually loud, even at work. With this recent change in me, I try to avoid speaking up as I did in the past, which is also impacting on my normal self as an ascertive person. I also started thinking that Im going through an early menopause, which ofcourse is not the case.
Kindly advise if any.
Thanks
I'm 28 and I have always
I'm 28 and I have always been quite shy and worried about doing the wrong thing and breaking rules. I blush when I have to talk about myself and the worst time ever was when flowers and a teddy bear were delivered to my work place from a boyfriend. I was shaking and so red and so out of control that I had to leave work and calm myself down. It's very comforting to know that other sensitive people suffer from the same problem. The only piece of advice I can give is to log the times when you blush and write down what caused the blushing and how long it lasted. This has helped me to be objective about it and when I blush I think of how interesting it will be to write it down and analyse it. Strangely, the more I've written it down, the less it's happening. I don't really understand why. Another thing that has helped me is to imagine life with no emotion, and being somebody who is as cool as a cucumber all the time. You wouldn't get that excited feeling before a first date, or the wonderful feeling of accomplishment and relief after a meeting or lesson has gone okay. I've found that 'enjoying' my extremes of emotion (I also cry at films, love deeply and laugh a lot) is the best way to deal with it. I'd love to be cool and never flustered, but I'm just learning not to take myself too seriously. One more thing: during one observed lesson I blushed so outrageously that I was red all day and even that night at home. I was mortified. Strangely though, after that day my students were much warmer and more open to me, and said that my blushing had shown i was just a normal person, not some strict, distant teacher. So it can have positive outcomes... good luck, everyone.
blushing
I wouldn't say I blush heaps but when I do I feel it burning my face, but when ,y 'friend' use to point out I was blushing, it only made me blush more because more people would look.
What I don't really understand is WHY we blush. I get that lots of blood suddenly pours into your face, but why?! I've heard of something like flight reaction or something which when you get nervous, embarrassed, worked up your body reacts with adrenalin and more blood to your face, which is in reality, your BRAIN so that you can THINK QUICKER. I think your body registers it as something terrible has happened, lots of adrenalin and blood need to be pumped around - especially lots of blood to the brain to think of quick ways to get out of the situation. Maybe this is right, when you blush do lots of thoughts go through your head?
What I find nerve wracking is giving speeches in front of a class. I think I don't look as nervous as I feel because my friend told me I didn't, and she gets nervous during speeches too - and I said you didn't look nervous either (which she didn't) even thought she told me she could feel hands shaking. So we delude ourselves into thinking we look ridiculous up there. My heart starts acting like it wants to jump out of my chest - it beats so fast, during speeches. I don't understand why people experience this during speeches. We're scared of how we look? sound? appear? that we'll screw something up? I just hate all the attention focused on me, 30 or so eyes glued to you.
blushing
I have read all the stories and i am feeling a lot better, because i know i am not the only one. I am almost 50 and have had this since i was 12. It really did hold me back for a long time and i finaly went to my dr. He prescribed effevexor and i feel a whole lot better. I think for me its loke a social phobia, anxiety, or god only knows why. All i know is i still blush but its not so bad as before the medication. The meds are costing me a fortune and i dont want to be on them forever, so i dont know what i will do?. I am trying to change how i feel and try to look my best all the time because when you feel you look good it seems you have a little bit more confidence and you dont blush as much. also i love the summer because i wear sunglasses and that helps a lot! even in the store where i blush the most meeting people i know. Thank you for allowing me to share, it really helps!.
I have never known anyone
I have never known anyone who blushes like I do. I find so much comfort in all of your stories and comments.
I am realizing it may be something I will never overcome (I am 40 years old). I consider myself painfully shy but I have lived a 'normal' life. I am married and have four children. I try to avoid social situations because I know I'll blush. It only bugs me if I know the people I am blushing in front of (I dread seeing people I know in the grocery store).
In a given situation, I usually blush for a minute or two and then kind of 'get over it' and don't blush again (unless someone calls me out on blushing).
I prefer dim lighting in a public place (I am fine in restaurants). Sunglasses make me more confident. Eye-contact makes me blush. The more confident I'm feeling about myself (if I think I look good, if I know what to expect in a situation, if I'm prepared about what someone might say to me) the less I blush.
The thing I hate most is when somebody comments on my blushing. Of course, I blush even harder. I have become very empathetic to others in my situation. If I notice someone blushing I completely ignore it. I wish others would do me the same courtesy.
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I am a very shy person and i tend to blush when someone is being mean and trying to get me to talk and them jus being an ass or when my crush is in the room ! i cant even look at his direction.....if i ever i would probably blush hella and he would know i like him....but i also blush when i dont know what to say to someone...
Just another fear then?
It seems that blushing is the reaction to a very general fear, just like a fear of heights, or spiders, or whatever else. Only difference is that our fears are clearly visible in our faces. It is great to know there are other people out there that experience the same thing. We are no freaks, we are just normal people experiencing fear in a different way, and I believe all fears can be controlled, or perhaps even overcome. The trick is not to focus on your face, but to focus on the words coming out your mouth. The less you focus on yourself, the less you will blush cause you won`t be thinking about it and if you don`t think about it, it doesn`t happen or get worst.
We just show our emotions in our faces. Unlike those cruel people who comment on your blushing that have no idea of emotions at all.
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