This Is Your Brain on Porn: Pornography Addiction, Society, and the Brain
Many of my drug using, sex crazed friends have said at least once that having an orgasm and doing a line of cocaine create the same feelings within the brain. I am able to understand why there is a chemical change when participating in a sexual act, but I cannot comprehend how people can be addicted to pornography, which has virtually no interaction with the viewer. Sexual acts that one partakes in, like all activities that one partakes in, changes the chemical reactions and firing rates in the brain; so why is it that viewing pornography, which is a mainly optical activity, can change the brain, and even more than that, create an addiction? Simply put, pornography addiction is the “abuse and overuse” (1) of various types of pornography; however, on a deeper level it is a very complicated subject. It raises both medical and social questions, and it is uncertain if the answers to these questions will ever be agreed upon. It is one of the few addictions that are just considered to be a psychological addiction; possibly because of that, most doctors do not consider it an actual addiction, but instead as a sub-condition of obsessive compulsive disorder (1).
While it is not considered a legitimate disease by many, pornography addiction does have similar symptoms: those affected are not able to control how often they engage in the behavior, engage in it to rid themselves of stress, work up a tolerance to it, and engage in the behavior instead of having social and personal interactions (1). These symptoms, especially the ultimate, have been exacerbated by the drastic increase of internet porn, which makes the medium readily available in the privacy of one’s own home. The extra convenience has occurred hand in hand with increasing opposition, stating that pornography in the home has effects on not only the person viewing it, but also those who stumble upon it, such as children. Many see it as a perversion of the home, and not as a real disease.
Another aspect of the addiction that makes it scientifically legitimate is the changes that occur in the brain when one engages in activities involving pornography. When an addict looks at porn, testosterone, dopamine, oxytocin, and serotonin are released, creating what Dr. Judith Reisman refers to as an “erototoxin” (2). The chemical change, which causes the person engaging in the act to have a temporary feeling of euphoria, becomes a necessity for the person to function. Like any other type of addict, porn addicts become trapped within their disorder, and the difference between casually watching pornography and being an addict hinges on the chemical makeup of the brain.
Pornography addiction is still very controversial, because the issue of its existence is still being constantly disputed. Scientists and moralists are entangled in a possibly endless argument, both publicly and privately, over the legitimacy of the addiction, as well as the differences between pornography addiction and other addictions, such as drug or alcohol addictions. While Dr. Judith Reisman agrees that viewing pornography causes a chemical change within the brain, she also believes that these changes will create a physical deterioration along with the psychological effects; however, as a critic of Reisman pointed out, “One unmentioned implication [of Reisman’s article] is the fact that, if sexual arousal from pornography causes 'brain damage', then so will real-life sex” (2). Since there is a reasonable possibility that having sex and viewing porn cause the same sort of stimulation in the brain, it would make sense that every time one engages in sex, one loses part of one’s mental faculties. Currently, there is no data to prove that this is true, and it appears as if there is no affirmative data about viewing pornography as well. Another issue of an addiction to porn is that while, with most drugs, it is possible to work all of the chemical out of the body after a certain amount of time, a pornographic image will stay in the memory as long as the memory exists. In a far more extreme interview, Dr. Judith Reisman stated, “[Pornography] could be more addictive than crack cocaine because cocaine can be excreted from the body. Pornographic images cannot. They remain, structurally and neurochemically, with a person forever” (3). She, as well as many others who believe that pornography addiction has more detrimental effects than other types of addiction, take the issue of addiction out of the scientific, and drag it into the sociopolitical. n
Personally, the research for this paper has raised more questions than it has answered. I am still unsure as to why it is considered a disease that branches out from obsessive compulsive disorder, as opposed to being on its own as a disorder. All addictions are obsessive, but not all are part of another disorder. It seems to me as if the squalor surrounding pornography addiction, not its scientific merit, has prevented it from becoming its own legitimate psychological disease. This has caused me to question how addictions are understood and proceeded with in both scientific and social realms, and also to understand that the variables of what determines a disease are not necessarily solely based on science or facts; much more plays into a disease than I had ever contemplated, especially ones that relate to something as that is discussed so much socially, morally, and politically, such as pornography.
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pornography_addiction
- http://www.mindhacks.com/blog/2005/07/attack_of_the_porno.html
- http://www.ewtn.com/library/ISSUES/REALKINS.HTM
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| This paper reflects the research and thoughts of a student at the time the paper was written for a course at Bryn Mawr College. Like other materials on Serendip, it is not intended to be "authoritative" but rather to help others further develop their own explorations. Web links were active as of the time the paper was posted but are not updated. |
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Comments
Loss of touch
I think porn takes away from us not only getting to know our partner physically, but mentally and spiritually. You miss out on lot and people seem to look over the fact that it can be something that ruins one's life. This is only the case because we are so programed to think it's normal in our society. I'm not some religious freak, just thinking about this morally. I am ninteen and refuse to grow into thinking this is morally correct in any way or normal. I choose love over sex any day, but this is the world we live in, right? Californiacation- song by redhotchilipeppers =)
Help yourself
I'd encourage anyone who is truly motivated to quit looking at pornography to read a book on the subject. There's a book by Skinner, 'Treating Pornography Addiction,' that I found to be particularly helpful in my own struggle. It presents a lot of good questions to try to help the reader understand why they look at pornography and to identify what triggers the need to look at pornography. I, personally, believe that true addicts will not get over their addiction without a solid understanding of addiciton. Willpower alone is not enough. You have to get to the point where you're educated enough about addiction and about your triggers, motivation, etc. that you can use each time you slip up as an opportunity to learn and become stronger. If you don't feel like you're learning from your mistakes, it may be time for a different approach.
God helps those who help themselves.
Porn is bad. Period!
I am a single mother aged 40 who has been fighting with addiction to porn. I started when my ex boyfriend started to insist that we watch it before we have sex. This was almost 15 years ago. I left him because he was cheating on me left and right. I also got born again after that, but the terrible habit had stuck and HARD! I hate myself so much when I surf and I start hitting those sites. I sometimes feel that I am a freak. Most of the people around me are innocent of porn. Most of them are very uncomfortable when something sexual pops up. But ME! Oh God help me. I get so excited and I have to seek relief by surfing. I do stop for some time and and I feel so proud of myself. Something then happens and I get hooked again. I want to be free. Today-right now. Pray for me guys. I think its worse for women who are addicted. The stigma is very bad. I just can't talk about it to anybody. I just agonize inside - a walking zombie really.
I wish all my fellow humans who know porn is no good and are struggling to get free all the best. Lets pray for each other
Anon woman
Prayers for Addiction
You have my prayers. I understand what this habit does to a person. It is terrible.
here is my story
I am only telling this story to get it down on paper... so that I, most of all, can benefit by understanding where I'm at.. and so that others can benefit by relating to my story. I am a 25 year old and (not to sound egotistical but only for purposes of understanding that it can happen to anyone) am also blessed with very good looks (sounds cheesy and egocentric but it's true). I am also successful in a lot of different areas of life... good at sports, play the drums for various rock bands, Im graduating from medical school to be a doctor... I have a lot of very attractive attributes for the ladies out there. But... I'm addicted to porn. And that makes me a social retard when I find a girl I want to flirt with.
So I started watching porn when i was 13 or so... would do anything to find a some boobs after my friends told me about porn. I didn't even know what the word meant... it was all new to me. But of course, everyone was doing it apparently and I was the last guy in my class to find out (or so it felt). I even remember asking my friend how to masturbate... so sheltered. My first pair of boobs I saw was on the playboy website, and the addiction grew fast. By the time I was 15 I would sit there for hours waiting for a 5 minute porno was downloading from napster. If I couldn't get my hands on a video I'd wait up late and night just to watch Brooke Burke on Wild on E! or wait for a girls gone wild commercial. I remember being so horny that I'd even masturbate with others in the room under a blanket. In highschool I had all the cute girls telling my sister in an upper class how they thought I was cute but I could never approach them... I just never had it in me like the other guys in my class. Man, I kept thinking it would just happen when it was supposed to happen. Never even kissed a girl until 12th grade... and then I was so unbelievably awkward that I told her I loved her a week later. Never got a call back from her haha... All this time I'm still watching porn every day and being socially reenforced by my peers telling me their favorite website or video or pornstar. So college hit... and so did alcohol. That eased the nerves of approaching the ladies. Had sex every chance I could with girls I met out at parties. Finally, in my 3rd year of college I literaly broke down and cried because every girl I had ever liked in college... every beautiful girl, with an amazing story, with great talents and passions... the only girls Ive ever been truly attracted to... I had failed with. I had made them think I was a creepy guy because I just couldn't act normal in front of them. I had to turn to God to ask him to send me someone... so at a party I met a beautiful, talented, passionate girl... for the record this girl was a russian bombshell that had even the Big Ten football players jealos... and with some pushing from my friends I asked her out. She was amazing at the time... it only lasted for 6 months because I had to leave to go away to school. She didn't stay with me. I blame it on my addiction.... but it has taken a long time for me to understand that. Over the past 4 years I was under the illusion that I got her because I was a pimp and every girl wanted to be with me. But over the past 4 years I've been watching porn more than ever. 3 girls in particular peaked my interest while Ive been at grad school... all of them I had failed with... because porn severely screws up your self esteem, confidence, and social interactions. So its been 4 years of frustration... each year worse than the last. Honestly, I deserve a great woman... I deserve someone to share life with... I deserve a good wife, and kids... But I can't have it unless I get over the first step and even get my foot in the door. I thought stopping sex was a good idea, and it was and is, but now its been 3 years since I made that decision and it hasn't changed a thing for my ability to approach the woman that I want. Listen, I can hang with the best of them when it means approaching women in general... I can schmooze a room full of good looking women.... but when the girl I want walks in, something takes over and I can't be me anymore. So recently, every time I fail... I've been going to porn... .and not just going to porn... I mean I could do an hour in the same session watching over 50 videos. 2-3 times a day.
Anyways.... that's the story and I hope it can relate to someone out there... but the reason I picked tonight to do it is because I know I can quit. I've done it a dozen times... for weeks and months. Most recently it only happened to be 2 weeks. It was so easy. I just left my computer at home while I went to my parents house for break. Didn't even masturbate for a week, and didn't realize it. I just forgot about it. But as soon as I got back to my place I got nosy. Look, I'm sure we all have triggers.... but mine is a hair trigger. If I see a hot girl in a movie I go and look her up on the internet for photos. Then it's just a dominoe effect after that. I "harmlessly" look up pictures... then I harmlessly take off the adult filter on google to find something more revealing... then I see boobs... and eventually in what seems like a blink of an eye I'm exiting out of 3 or 4 porn sites an hour later with a sinking feeling in my gut like "what did I just do". But ill shrug it off and say it was a 1 time thing. Couple hours later I'll say to myself, "I only did it once... twice can't be any worse...then I'll be done." Not true. I'm now on my 4 day in a row of saying that to myself and I'm fed up with myself and my addiction. That's not to say I haven'y been fed up 100 times before... but this time I had to see if anyone else was going through the same thing. Because, this is something so private to me that I can't bring it up to anyone I know.
So I recently went to a seminar with my favorite doctor speaking. He asked us to do a cost/benefit analysis of something that we did not want in our lives. First you begin with your belief... if you have morals, you understand that watching pornography is against your belief system. We do it anyways... So write down where you think you will be a year from now if you choose to continue this immoral activity. Then write down where you think you will be in a year if you choose to stop being incongruent with your belief system. Compare and you can finally confront your addiction on paper, and decide the road you would be better off traveling. My cost list has things like battling depression, social awkwardness, inability to approach women, mood swings, constant disappointment in myself, lowered self esteem... my benefit list after a year includes higher self esteem, increased libido, increased confidence, better social interactions, better relationship with God. Your will undoubtedly look a lot like mine... so it would be ludicrous to pick the "cost" road wouldn't it? It takes self control and dedication to rid ourselves of this addiction... it won't come easy at first... but it has to happen to reap the benefits. We reap what we sow... I hope that this is the turning point for me and whoever reads and appreciates this.
Completely
I can entirely appeciate this and it's exactly the same thing for myself, minus being blessed with amazing good looks and unparalleled intelligence, heh. But, in all honesty, I can relate completely. Your cost analysis, though, is a very helpful way of looking at it, and provides some good goals I am going to plan to strive for. Thank you very much.
I'm glad you can appreciate
I'm glad you can appreciate my post L.T. Ive only been done now for 2 weeks, and I know that there is a possibility for me to fall back into my old ways... but I gotta tell you, it doesn't feel that way this time. I really think that an addiction that's lasted that long requires an emotional breakthrough. Tell your story man. I think its a way that you can take a step back and look at yourself from the outside and appreciate the entirety of your addiction. Good luck and God bless!
dont fight it, embrace it!
Man, what you describing as your story is completely common with most normal guys. I doubt your social incapability was caused by watching porn - you would have been like that anyway, your awkwardness when approaching girls comes from your personality.
Porn is not bad if you can watching in moderate way - its like with everything - if its something too much, it will harm you. What you have to do is embrace it, not to fight it. Porn is good, it must have been created by God because it makes us feel good. Its like with real sex - if God would not want us to have sex and watch porn, he would have not created neither one.
So don't feel ashamed or other nonsense when masturbating, just embrace and enjoy it - that is the only way to cut down on watching porn - don't restrict yourself, that makes you wanting it even more. If you know you can have it without feeling bad, you will not want it that much. And that is the thing - watch porno moderately. It wont harm you and you will appreciate it more than if you watch it too much (sort of a porn overdose).
Good luck and don't delete your stash - I have done that once and still regret it :)
And god made heroin and
And god made heroin and crack. What a stupid response.
here is my story
I have just finished praying for you, friend. I sincerely hope that God will free you from this addiction. The cost of this addiction is too much. Your life is much much better without porn. You don't want to be 50 and still have this problem. Ditch it now.
Thank you so much for your
Thank you so much for your prayers... when I saw that I read my post again and when I realized that I had finally been able to tell someone I broke down and cried for the first time in years. It felt so good to know that someone prayed for me... I finally had the emotion that I have long sought... I felt genuinely apologetic and repentant. I knew that God could see it it in me for the first time in a long time... I have the strong feeling that I can be done forever. Every time I had asked him for the strength to stop I left room for slip ups in the future... I could never promise him that I would never go back. Now I feel the strength to put it all in my past.
Thanks for your prayers
We cannot deny who God created us to be. And, I can guarantee you, He wants the best for us. That means intimacy with the opposite sex in marriage, without porn. I wish you the best as you go through life and find the woman you'll spend the rest of your life with.
My goodness, does anyone know
My goodness, does anyone know how to spell and use proper grammar here?
Sorry
Sorry, every rule of grammer and memorised word of the engrish langwage haz ben over ritten with pron.
I Need Help!
Hi, I've got a little story of my own to tell. But I'm seeking an answer to the question I ask. I'm 25 years old and I am a christian that goes to church regularly. I believe in Jesus Christ, He is my Lord and Saviour and nothing will ever change that. Just want to make sure that's known. But I'll work that part in. Before I become a strong believer, my story starts like this. I've been looking at porn consistently since the age of 13. My first exposure was at about 10 or 11ish, don't know for sure, but I misspelled a website name and ended up on a porn site. Very curious, I scrolled through a whole bunch of text just to see if any pics would show up and BAM! there were titties right there. I gasped, scrolled back up, and closed the window, disgusted by what I saw. A year or two later, my freshman year in high school, my friend found a porno tape in his parents closet and decided that it would fun to show it to me. He figured I had already seen some porn, so some hardcore stuff on a video wouldn't hurt. He was wrong, I had never seen that before, and that video shocked me. I just watched, in awe, of what they were doing. From that moment, I thought about what I saw and wanted to see more. I found a website, and then found more websites, developed attachments to certain models, and developed this horrible addiction I have today, despite the numerous times I've been caught, talked to a pastor, talked to my discipler, talked to my own parents, and my friends. And what makes everything even stranger is the fact that I've never had actual sex before. I want to save that for marriage. Some people want to try to tie real sex and porn together, and in my case, it's not part of the equation. So, I decided to become a stronger christian in 2009 for a variety of reasons. I thought that would help curb my addiction. It did for a couple weeks, but I soon went back to it. Like a roller coaster, I had times where it was under control for up to a month, and then to where it was an insatiable urge stealing my attention several times a day. I'm in the latter part right now. It's worse than ever. I feel no desire to try to fight it. Reliance on Jesus is not present. I just go look at porn and masturbate whenever the urge pops up. I'm sick of it, and want it gone, but have no idea what to do about it, or where to go to get help for it. My question is if seeing a psychologist would be useful. Would a psychologist be able to help me find ways to get rid of this? Any help any one can give would be much appreciated. Sorry if a whole bunch of this doesn't make any sense or seem relevant, but it's my story and I wanted to get it out there.
Hey there, Fellow Christian
Hey there,
Fellow Christian here. I've been struggling with porn addiction too for the past couple of years and I'd frankly like to stop. It's made me into someone who's too guilt-ridden and spiritually weak to be a strong source of support for other Christians.
Seriously, I don't have any concrete solutions for you that'll solve your problem overnight. Like you, I've reached a point where I'm sick of it. I really am. That's why what I'm planning to do is to STOP going to porn sites, keeping my door open (I share a place with someone) as much as possible, and best of all, cracking open the Word. You'd be surprised at the way God speaks to you. Spend some time with Christians. I'm in grad school, so I'm super busy, only limited to going to church once a week. Find an accountability group. Find a mentor in whom you can confide.
HTH. I know it's been a month, but hey, this is the only way I can help!!!
I share a similar problem and
I share a similar problem and the only thing that has worked for me is accountability. Find someone who you are slightly intimidated by who you would almost me ashamed to tell you look at porn. Ask them to become your accountability partner and have them ask you once a week or twice a month if you have watched porn or been smart on the internet. Do not lie to them because that will screw everything up. Just be honest and this should greatly help you. It worked for me and life without porn is amazing.
Heavy porn use and masturbation is often caused by anxiety
I think, in the cases of a large percentage of men, you are looking at this backwards. For many heavy porn users/masturbators it is a discomfort with sex in a intimate relationship that causes them to turn to solo sex.
Intimacy anxiety, attachment disorders, depression,low self esteem, performance anxiety, schizoid and other personality disorders, make interpersonal relations in general and sexual relations specifically very stressful and anxiety inducing. In some cases the stress and anxiety is so bad during sex with a partner it causes the man to suffer from erectile and ejaculation difficulties which amplify the anxiety even further.
For these men porn and masturbation is a solution to their problems not the cause.
It is only when these men are masturbating alone that they can fully enjoy their sexuality. The unlimited variety, rich fantasy experience and the absence of the need to perform or to please allows them to relax and enjoy the experience rather than dreading it as they do when they attempt to have sex with a partner.
Most studies of men who use porn and masturbate heavily and in preference to sex with a partner also show them as having interpersonal difficulties in other aspects of their lives such as friends and their work/school environment.
Whether or not these men would be more successful in their interpersonal relations with others should they give up porn and masturbation is debatable. Their low levels of available dopamine and other neurochemicals (and the resulting disorders- see above) are caused by childhood trauma or, more likely, they are an inherited brain dysfunction so abstaining from sexual self pleasure will simply cut them off from all forms of sexual relief rather than enhancing their social capabilities.
There is a way out of porn
hello ppl,
i had been doin porn for some years as well.I had found a k9 web protection filter like 3 months back and I had customized it according to my needs. (like filtering porn,adult content etc) and wrote a 15 random digits in a paper and set it as the password as the administrator and a email id (which i created for installing). Well u mite ask wats the purpose of creating web filter if u kno the password.. so I flushed the paper(u can burn it as well hehe :D) in which i had written the password.. deleted the email id as well... they are pretty gud security company and there is no way to bypass or uninstall the software nd best part is it is FREE..all in all super gud..i have had porn free 3 months..nd i hv meditated,yoga, sports..and gettin back to shape as well..pls share to fellow ppl ..god bless all...take care
Porn Addict since 10, watchu got???
Alright, listen here dick-pullers, sit back and read, cause I`ve got a story to tell. I`m 20, been watching porn since 10, at first just because I was the type of kid who got high off being sneaky, and going behind my mama`s back, it wasn`t so much about the porn per say. Anyways, that being said, I started to masturbate at 12, I remember when my boner, my right hand, and Vaseline all met together for the first time, and I`ll never forget it, because it`s like getting high for the first time (if you smoke weed, or something). Anyways, I started off with NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC photos that I stole from my art teacher in grade7-8, whatchu know about that!!! Lol, and then I decided to kick it up a notch, particularly around 14, and 15. I would go on the internet, and since I had so little experience, I didn`t even know how to cover my tracks, especially since I was using the family computer, Jesus Christ I was stupid. Anyways, my mom and stepdad would often catch me, one time I was jacking off in the living room, watching porn, and I heard them coming up stairs, so I quickly restarted the computer, pulled up my pants, and barely managed to button up, when they came through the door, to see me trippin`balls, literally, I pulled my pants up so fast, I could`ve fucking lost them. I remember feeling so embarrassed, every time I would get caught, and for those who have "religion/God" guilt, I feel you. I am not in any way religious, but growing up as a teen, I did have an interest, and I would pray, read the bible, follow the preaching’s, go to church (occasionally), etc. Just because I don`t do that now, doesn`t mean I don`t know what it`s like; to feel guilty towards God for watching porn and what knot. And I am not going to argue either case, because I am telling my fucking story, so let`s save the arguing for the pal who have nothing better to do, than argue over the internet. ANYWAYS, I eventually mastered hiding my porn addiction, while using and manipulating my family to support it without them knowing, and yeah I know that behaviour may sound raunchy, well, because it is raunchy, but I fucking suffered for it, and I am not afraid to admit to anyone who asks me, what I did, because the truth will set us free, so to speak. So, finally, at 18, I bought my own laptop, and just splurged in the porn sea for like a year and a half, with like no worries. I stopped feeling guilty for watching porn completely at around this time, and I learned that FROM MY EXPERIENCE, that there really is no reason to feel guilty for watching pornography, it`s just that if you feel guilty, it is most probably linked to the behaviour behind your porn addiction, or porn use, however often it may be. You may be going against your family and/or religious values. If that is the case, you`re are still wasting your time to feel guilty (in my opinion), because if you`re indulging in all the pleasures of having a non-human, non-emotional, machine fulfill your sexual desires, without any effort required, than why the fuck are you then turning around and complaining about the bad consequences? Bitch, make a decision, and live with the consequences, and if you end up in hell, or become a computer zombie, don`t fucking complain, I`ve been watching porn for 10 motherfucking years, deceived my family for it, held me back from fucking REAL PEOPLE (man or woman, whatever), being in real life relationships, and I suffer for it TO THIS DAY! DO I complain? Fuck off, why should I? YES, it does suck that I (at least to my strong belief) have succumb to a critical condition of social and flirting retardation because of investing so much time and energy in a piece of machinery that wouldn`t have the heart to care whether or not I live another day. AND??? Fuck I`m 20 years old, the fact that I have this experience has cultivated a certain wisdom within my soul that I am now going to use for the good, and not the evil, pornography bathe in the swamp of its own filthy shit for all I care, let the government shut down all the porn sites (which they will never do, because they like to keep their cabbage-headed people nice and stupid), man I`ll keep walking my way like nothing fucking happened. AS of today, I am done with that shit. I am going to go and find a nice, fresh [...] that will love my dick with all the moist, tender love it can muster. YOU CAN DO IT TO! But do wtv you want, I don`t give a damn shit, even if no one ends up reading this shit, I`ll be content, but if you do learn something, I`m happy for you, now go and be a better person, and do whatever you want, and if you complain for the consequences of YOUR CHOICES, not only will the world laugh at you, the world will chew you up, swallow your guts and [...], no joke, I am serious.
PEACE OUT, and GOOD LUCK!!!!!!
Gabriel, I have been a porn
Gabriel, I have been a porn addict off and on as well for the last 30 years and was 1st exposed when I was 8. I just want you to know that it's not your fault...somewhere along the line someone exposed you to images you shouldn't have been expose to (creepy teacher). I would suggest that you get help as I have been sober for three years but just relapsed recently. I am really sad about it but I am not going to let it steal my life like it has in the past. Also, I have been a christian my whole life and struggled with all the things you were saying too and just know that God doesn't hate us. Just do your best.
Hello everyone.
Hello everyone.I am a 16 year old boy thats been addicted to porn for 4 years now.I am a christian,and I feel ashamed that I constantly sin against God on a daily basis.It is getting to the point where I feel uncomfortable praying because I know that I will do it again.I have never had a girlfriend and I feel sad about it.I know how most of you feel.I am afraid to tell my dad because if he knew about it,he would tell how wrong I am.I am so blessed that I know that I am not the only one going through this .I dont want to masterbate anymore.I am getting to tired of keeping it under wraps and I will not stop praying because I know that my Lord Jesus will help me.Please pray for me and I will pray for all of you.
For the 16 year old
For the 16 year old Christian. Please forgive me for small errors and lengthy a discussion but this is very serious and I have little time. Don't give up. One of the problems with society is that if one can't explain something using "science" it is assumed that there is little or no legitimacy to the issue. Unfortunatey Cayla neglected a number of factors that heavily influence the "success" or " failure" of our understanding of this quasi disorder. Another problem is the interjection of God into this issue. Many churches will steer clear of this issue which only adds more to the spiritual aspects of youir guilt. You don't want to disappoint God, but in many religions / churches we are also taught that masturbation is wrong. At sixteen years old with raging hormones this is not very helpful. Even at 50+ years old with raging hormones it is an issue (this issue confronts many good individuals at all ages) . After all how did we stumble on this site. We must be researching this issue for many of the same reasons. First, you already realize that confronting this annoyance now will save you from dealing with deeper more devastating issues later. This is true. If you are serious about your God and your faith you will not allow idiots to demean you or throw in some sort of voodoo science that is inconclusive or slanted to make a point. You are human, you have physical functions that need to be met. Rather than venting your sexuality in any number or detrimental ways ie: promiscuity (which in fact destroys many elements of respect for women as you increase your sexual encounters), forced sex (destructive to victim and empowering to the aggressor), etc. True addicts will destroy anything to get a fix. Just as true with sexual deviants. You hardly sound like a deviant to me but if you persist in this constant guilt that is not from your God than you will never begin to understand how to regulate and control your urges just as you would scratching an itch or urinating. The material you use as your visual stimulant can be viewed in a number of ways, unfortunately most probably are damaging and a deterrant to your quest . This is where the problem really begins as does the understanding and the control elements of this particular issue. Understand that this is not some college thesis issue where you are left with statements such as "I was left with more questions than answers". Well if you have more questions than answers and you still continued to write this "paper" than you have acted very irresponsibly and obviously are not in a position of being viewed as a fair journalist. Kinda' makes as much sense as becoming a neuro surgeon after using wikipedia and other generic sources for information. Cayla does not seem to care if you are earnestly attempting to grow and mature without hiding from anything that might expose this and free you, otherwise her expose' would have reflected genuine understanding as one that has counciled many at all ages in accepting themselves and not blaming a fictitious god that has been defined by those who have no clue. The God you speek of and put faith in causes people to not become enslaved by anything. Quite simply... Moderation, prayer,dilligence, and get all the info from folks who are comfortable with being non-judgemental. It will be a lifetime battle it is just the flesh tryin' to run the show-your spirit is doing just fine.
God aside...
It is both amusing and insane how much hope some people on this page are putting into "God" to help their porn addiction, or any addiction for that matter. Im not here to bash any religion but the only way to stop an addiction is through your own mind. If you believe that God gave you this mind, so be it, but its already been given and you must change it yourself. Take some responsibility and find other things to do, learn a musical instrument, take up a sport, find a girlfriend after youve stopped jerking it for a while. It is possible to stop, youve just got to know your strong enough, and everyone is. Meditation is also key to any sort of change taking place in the mind, and i would recommend this as a priority to anyone overcoming an addiction. As someone who has smoked the green for 4 years and then stopped, and used to be addicted to porn, I hope you take my advice. look up some meditation technique and/or just get a hobby to fill in the time! best luck
porn viewing
This is stupid its not classified as a disease, its like an OCD thing the person just has to do it. I really don't understand how anyone can get addicted to porn (lol). I am 19 and yeah i watch my fair share but its boring just seeing the same shit over and over agian and my morals a pretty steep so i don't watch really trashy porn that stuff is not a turn on just gross.
The fastest way to overcome any addiction is to find a reason to hate it. This is a simple thing to do for many people and if you feel like your powerless over your computer and a video that's made up of a few 100 pixels than get some help seriously.Porn is there because people like the way sex feels and some enjoy watching it. I can't stand conservative values being pushed on any one. If a person has a high sex drive i would much rather them watch porn and masturbate than get some one pregnant.
You all sound like this stupid ass writer who only writes emotional bull crap to get people to like his stupid articles Mark Kastleman. Whats funny about all of this is that pornography didn't cause a person to be addicted to it its the person who is watching it that must exercise self control, or simply date some one who they would be interested in having sex with. lol porn is a dangerous weapon jimmy its the ammo for the rod riffle lol
Confession
Dear All
I have also really struggled with a pornography problem for up to 7 years now. I am a Roman Catholic and it is out of going to frequent confession that I have recently managed to control pornography and masturbation. I have none the less relapsed at times and today I decided to investigate the effects that pornography has on my brain so as to strengthen my resolve against it. I have read through a number of Dr. Judith Reismans articles (which you can all access on this site http://drjudithreisman.org/) and I am glad that I stumbled upon this website.
The key thing about confession that I would like to highlight is that it is free therapy and it does a great deal in helping me know that that sin has been forgiven and that I am right with God. After confession people cannot point an accusing fingers since believe it or not every one has some skeletons in their closets as was the case with the men who wanted to stone Martha in the Gospel but it turned out that they were even greater sinners. If someone has no skeletons than it would mean that that person is a saint and as opposed to looking down upon you with a judgmental eye, he or she will endeavor to assist you.
I have taken up some of the advise given here by enrolling into a cycling club and I also plan to join a basketball team so as to ensure that I am DOING STUFF.
Dear sir, I'm glad to hear
Dear sir,
I'm glad to hear you empowered yourself in controlling this addiction. While I admit the therapy and your religious believes surely helped you to go through, I would like to encourage you in little bit different way that I find effective and would like to share with you.
First of all the porn addiction comes from the natural need for sexual reproduction. One have to be aware of this hidden power to be able to control it.
Today we are bombarded by visual junk that subconsciously actives our hidden instincts to create arousal and lead to a successful deal with the advertiser. Don't fall for that.
Frequent sexual stimulation depletes brain from important chemicals such as dopamine, serotonin, testosterone and oxytocin (article). These chemicals are needed besides proper body functioning for human motivation and social interaction. Because of the overstimulation and the nature of our brain, we become tolerant to these chemicals and crave for more. Therefore stopping this chemical release comes with unwillingness of brain to get back to normal levels, because it feels very unfulfilled. When person can't cope with this craving he does anything to remove this stress. Reasonable person understands that this is only short term satisfaction and not long term solution. The addiction alters reasoning and hijacks person to remove craving without him being aware. It's only about the brain feeling good. When a person regains normal chemical levels that individual becomes more motivated, outgoing, sensitive (as opposed to numbed senses) and has higher self-esteem. This fact itself is essential for happy daily life. It should be one's obligation to reason before altering his highly complex and sensitive reward circuity. When used improperly or malfunctioning it must be one's highest priority to get it fixed.
Porn Addiction
One contributor asserted that porn changes the brain over time. I was 21 when I saw my first porn movie. I didn't understand what happened, but I felt a rush of good stuff pouring out of my brain. It was mesmerizing and felt great. It was an incredible rush. It was also the worst mistake of my life.
porn has ruined me
I became addicted to porn in 6th grade. I used to be athletic, popular, a guy who all the girls liked. Im now in 8th grade, a fat, ugly, social recluse, all because I gave into porn. The guilt and shame is unbearable. I feel disgusting. I cant be around friends without me fantasizing about there moms and sisters. I turned my back on family friends and God. I have become the monster I once hated. And it disgusts. Please think and pray about me. I would appreciate it.
Stay strong...satan is trying
Stay strong...satan is trying to tear you apart and God is more powerful. The are literally MILLIONS of americans who suffer from the same thing. Please tell someone trustworthy and know that I am praying for you.
The biggest thing for you
The biggest thing for you right now is to swallow your pride, and quit torturing yourself over a few mistakes. Turn to God with your whole heart, go to confession, fast and pray. My goodness, you're only in the eighth grade -- you've got your whole life ahead of you. Realize that Jesus loves you more than you can know, talk to Him in the morning, and just try to live each day well. Figure out what you'd like to do, and focus your energy on that. Mathematics is a very rewarding subject, for instance.
Best wishes.
Oliver
dear connor, please don't get
dear connor,
please don't get disappointed but u should thank god that he has made u realized ur mistake so early.u have just wasted only two precious years of ur life. there are people like me who didn't even realized this mistake for years and when they realized it was too late.dear connor u r in std 8th ur life is ahead for u just take a revolution in ur heart and say no to porn and m.bcoz of porn and m feel u guilty, u will be stressed , u will not be able to concentrate on ur studies and sports and most important is when u grow up ,when u will actually experience a real sexual life u will be a loser. and if u quit these two things u will have a healthy and happy life, u will do better in ur stuides and sports. so choice is urs what kind of life u want.Dear connor i was brainy child but i ended up as an average child in my life bcoz of these two things. please don't ruin ur life .kindly consider my advice as ur experinced brothers advice.
Bashing the bishop
Dear Connor,
Don't be worrying about all of this stuff. It is a difficult time when you are young, and you get horney all of the time, and sometimes you're just physically arroused and it has nothing to do with anything in your head. I am British (Irish descent) and was sort of bought up as a Catholic.
In England, we have a sensible tollerance and observance of various religeons. However, when we have a problem with something, someone, or, ourselves, we seldom mention Jesus. I don't pretend to know whether Jesus existed. I also challenge people to why it's important. I hope he exiseted, and "his" message was a very good one. We intrinsically know what's right and wrong.
When you are dealing with these things, you can rest assured that Jesus and praying, are not going to help. Wanking is good, and I'd say very sensible. However, excercise is also very important - NO MORE SO THEN WHEN YOU ARE YOUNG - and not excerising, and getting out in the sun, which is aslo essential, is the thing which will sort you out.
The problem is that whilst drugs and drinking - also normal if you aren't an American - are an excellent, good laugh, and personal developer, in most instances; however, if not tempered with the absolutely essential excercise, can become a problem.
Cars are not your friend. Again in England, walking to places, solves a lot of this porblem.
In the US, most of you eat rubbish all of the time, which is again, a massive problem. Remember, the EU countries pay a lot in fines to the UN, so that they don't have to import US beef; lots of the prescription drugs are illegal; and most people are not overweight, as a result, but those that are normally aren't really contenders alongside some of the elephants that I see wandling about talking loudly at our tourist loactions. These poor people are killing themselves by eating rubbish chemicals all of the time.
Again, fixating about women all of the time is totally normal. Hopefully you are lucky enough not to be fixating on men. Just think about how confused the non-normal urges must be to handle. They are in the increase, and they are at the considerably less harmful end of the spectrum. I know it feels awkward when you bump into them the next day but that's just one of those things.
Guilt, thereby comes into the picture. You are in the situation that you are in as you are young and can't get to do what you want due to social constraignts, such as living at home, and having to go to school, there being nothing to do, etc.. Remember, none of this is your fault. It is very, very common. I've known a few seemingly normal people, who've confided that they went to Amsterdamme with their dad (and his mates, sometimes), and they got them out a load of hookers, or, went to spain, and managed to use the shared room, on the 'helpful' advice of their parent. This is all a bit weird to me, but you have to think; is this a good thing? I don't think it's that good, and so you have to look at the other end of the spectum, for comparrissions.
Also remember that not getting involved with people out of desperation, is also something which is probably commendable. I know a lot of people who threw their lives away due to wanting to get their ends away, so they started going out with someone when they were to young to get a job, or have finished the basic things to secure alright money for their future. THis can work out, but almost never does.
Religeons pray on gulit. Society plays on people's fear and guilt to control them. If you dispel guilt, so much that it is something which you realize was totally misplaced on this type of minor, unavoidable stuff, your life will get better, and you wont' be feeling bad, etc..
One other thing you might like to try would be cutting out meat for a month, and seeing how that goes. Meat creates a lot of acid in the body, as does milk, and other dairy products. I eat both quite a lot, but these thigns definitely do effect your health and moods. I think, whilst they're nice, once you stop using them, you don't really remember why you ever liked them.
Let me know how you get on, and no praying - about this - in the meantime. If you get any silly ideas that God wants you to bothering him about some woman who you'd like to do things to, who he made you fancy, then you need to remember that he's not a petty moron, so don't treat him like he is. If he exists, he's going to be very annoyed with all of his apparent devout followers, who think he wants to be bothered about their and young men on forum's sexual thoughts. If he knows everythign this will annoy him. He will be thinking that their petty self-centred fixations are out of line with things such as murdering loads of people in foreign countries, for no reason.
Wanking will not get a look in.
You need milk for calcium
You need milk for calcium without it you are stressed all the time. You need meet for just about everything else in your body. God is not a matter of belief anymore, God IS real. The Creator and religion can nowdays be proven logically and scientifically. He made men and women, but set certain rules. It's what seperates us from animals, and saves us a lot of trips to the shrink. ;) God also wouldn't want us developing any addictions or wasting energy he gave us, when we can use our healthy being to be of use on this earth. Harm to self is harm done to others.
You are NOT a bad person.
Hi I was researching this due to my topic for a paper I am working on and stumbled across your reply to the article.
You are not a bad person and are not any of those things that you described yourself as. Everyone goes through times of weakness where something might have gotten out of hand. But what is important and commendable to you is that you realize that you have a problem. So it can only get better, as you try to break the habit which you will.
Take an outsider's perspective.
Good luck.
answer
all ways ask the holy spirt to guide you ,the problem is you want be able to getout of it at once and specially trying by your self only the lord can help you listen to him at first it will be very hard but just obey him you will deffanetly get out off it just prey and give the problem to him and from the next day dont prey for the same thing just thank him every day for getting you out off it and thats what satan hates you having faithin jesus even befor he gives the solution always remember satan like a roaring lion is waiting till you go out from the flock of jesus to grab you and eat you will also prey for you
if need any help you can write to
i had the same problem and jesus saved me!
its a soul destroyer
hi ive been addicted to porn a long time.....im 24. I first started watching porn when i was 16 then my habit grew and grew to the point where I knew I had a problem. Porn does destroy your innocence and it can turn anyone into a monster. My porn addiction was bad before and one time I was watching tv and then the porn idea came to mind and I started to browse and stuff and then I felt the monster being fed. I then grabbed my laptop and took it out to the park and smashed it to bits. I then went home and felt better. If i ever have children I will warn them of this evil in sheep clothing before they get caught up in it.The best way i found to deal with this problem was to ask God for forgiveness of my sick fantasies and try my hardest to not look at that garbage. Once I was looking at porn everyday i felt sick inside when i was completly healthy. Remember to ask God to forgive you and give you strength to fight off the addiction. Once yoou start doing this on a regular basis you WILL feel better trust me.
I was addicted to porn for 15
I was addicted to porn for 15 yrs, I'm now 34 yrs old and haven't a wife or girlfriend because of all that wasted time in front of the computer. This year I went on an alpha coarse at my local church, where we prayed about my addiction, later that week I was about to go onto the net again and look at porn and I prayed for help and I all of a sudden I felt the holy spirit descend apron me! and since then I have been a totally different person, and my porn habit has dissapeared. I know there are people out there thinking this is a rubbish story and all that, however it's absolutely the truth. I suggest you do the same, find out from friends which is a good church to go to in you're area and go on the alpha coarse, what do you have to loose!
Cheers
Mark
Addictive Personality Disorder
What you've experienced is very common, although it can show through a million different ways.
What you're suffering from is not Pornography addiction, it's just addictive personality disorder. Instead of porn it could've been drugs, or anything really.
It's not the porn itself that's the problem, it's often the people watching it sad to say. I myself have problems with addictive personality disorder, but I went to a therapist through contacting my schoolnurse at a pretty low age(early teens). I got rid of my problems but I can't for example drink alcohol or do things that gives you adrenaline kicks, I easilly get addicted to it.
This disorder is something as I said very common, it just takes different forms, and I think it's wrong to blame the things you get addicted to actuallly, because many people can handle it just fine, you just have to know for yourself what's right. Sorry If I offended you or your beliefs in anyways, but hey what would we do without freedom of speech!
The Only Way Out: Jesus Christ.
Jesus is the only way out of this. The non-religious people may disagree and tell you that you can do it by going to the doctor's office and setting an appointment for psychiatric help. This will not do my friends. I don't care how smart you think you are. I don't care how strong you believe you are. As a person commented here it's hard for the non-religious people as well. You'll see families destroyed, 40 year marriages flushed down the toilet. This is not a "little" problem that some people would like to think. It's not just simply a "hobby." It's a KILLER. It's silent at first but then slowy decays and shoots you up with venomous toxin that will eat away at your life. Most people might even know at first that their significant other is acted to porn. Until it's too late. The side effects of porn are terrible. I read an article stating that everything in your mind gets stored for later use. This would make sense to everyone right? I've been a porn addict for quite awhile. I started really young. I started at around 10 or 11. I would watch some of my father's videos and then when I got into high school it got worse. I would masturbate everyday. Porn gave me such a blurred image that I would look for new pornstars to masturbate to. These images do get stored in your head people. You can be at work, college, high school, or anywhere. I've had images pop up in my head from time to time for really no apparent reason. You know how when you think everything is going ok? Then all the sudden. Bam! It hits you. How did that thought get there? Blame it on porn. It's highly addictive and VERY hard to get out of. Most people end up failing because they have no hope. They think they can't get out of it. They are broken inside and there seems like no way out. ONLY THROUGH JESUS WILL YOU GET OUT OF THIS MESS. That's the only way. There is no miracle cure, there is no antidote you can drink. This is the only way. Look, I don't care if you disagree with me. Jesus is the only way you'll get out of this addiction. Jesus can beat any addiction. He Loves You. He cares for you. The porn industry does not give a rat's behind about you. Trust someone who loves you. Trust Jesus. God Bless.
Porn adiction
You are absolutely right only Jesus can heal you from porn adiction because it is inherently a sin which satan brings upon us and therefore we need to fight it in the spiritual realm and not the physical level or the flesh. I was hooked on porn for most of my life and I am now 56 y/o. A couple of months ago I repented my adiction and my pastor and I prayed together and I took my adiction and laid it down at the cross and asked Jesus to wash me clean in his blood. We prayed for the cleansing of every sensory organ which I used in pornography to get rid of the memories of all the photos and videos i watched. I was a compulsive masturbator and could not stop despite the fact that I am married and and have children it drove me towards gay activities more and more. You never get enough and you get compelled to explore more and more new avenues to get new sensations and therefore it destroyes you systematically and that is what satan wants to do. I invited Jesus into my heart and became reborn which means that The Holy Spirit now lives in my heart and He helps me to stay clean and helps me to dampen the feelings of lust. I have vertually stopped masturbating and now begin to have normal sexual feelings toward my wife the way it should be. Every time a image pops up in your mind its satan trying to win you over to start again. With Jesus in your heart satan is weak and cannot touch you. All you should do is to command that image to leave your mind in the name of Jesus and see the result. For those people not believing me, open your eyes please because Jesus is there waiting for you to only say to him to please come into your life and He will do so and change your life to something you could not have imagined. Praise the Lord for what and who He is, the Great Healer of all times. Amen and Halleluja !!!!!!
lulz@u
(Athene's Theory of Everything -)
Based off your comment, I doubt you may be able to understand the implications of this video I posted above and about the state of the cognitive mind. Your argument is entirely subjective as religious fanaticism and has ZERO supporting scientific claims. Spirituality is a primary source of dissonance within this world for those in need of real answers. Placing your faith in abstract creationist stories, and guiding your ethical values based off emotional attachments to a system of beliefs is what has promoted your addiction in the fist place. You think your mind is free behind your shield of god however you are not free under this delusion. Your cognitive dissonance has lead you to a state of denial where you use religion as a curtain to justify what is reality. If you truly wish to overcome an addiction such as pornographic addiction you must analyze what is the root cause of the problem. Masturbation or pornography is not an act of sin or evil, such labeling is not constructive to the scientific mind nor towards finding a resolution for the problem.
Excessive engagement of masturbation can be a cause for concern if it is effecting your personal lives. It is your choice and duty to know what you want. If this truly is a problem the best method of fixing it is through social validation. Through feeling acceptance of others you will actively be getting a healthier fix of the similar chemicals released during masturbation. Social validation stimulates the dopamine receptors in the brain and increases serotonin levels while activating and increasing the function of reward neurons. This decreases emotional fixation and irrational labeling leading to an increase in the ability to become self-aware. This is a first step towards a better healthier life. Surround yourself with others who share similar values and learn the importance of trust. Consider taking up a constructive hobby or enroll in a local university and engage in the exchange of ideas with others. Attending church is also a great way to feel validation, however you should not focus on the hand of god as a medical cure. All of these are good ways to gain validation and progress towards a more healthy emotional and physical lifestyle.
Do not take for granted to capabilities of the human mind. Neuro-plasticity can allow you to accomplish any feat of mental aptitude as hard effort physically transforms your neural pathways increasingly towards performing a single task with extreme efficiency.
Jesus Christ is in your mind. Human Beings are Gods.
The Root of the Problem
And in your last statement, you have analyzed the root of the problem. "Human beings are Gods." Humans chose themselves to be God in the beginning of the world. And because of that, what we were created to rule over now rules us. Sex was created to be used in a worshipful way to God between one man and one woman. But now, humans use this thing that was created to be the ultimate intimacy and completely abuse it, sharing their most intimate physical, mental, and emotional parts of their being with others over the internet. As the brother above stated, it is a venom that will destroy you. It has physical, emotional, and spiritual consequences, and it will kill you. "Jesus Christ is in your mind." He's in everyones mind, they just suppress the truth of it. But don't forget, He's also seated at the right hand of His Father, the Creator of everything. He swallowed the full wrath of God against the sin of man on the cross. The curtain of the Holy of Holies, the dwelling place of God was split from the top to bottom. God's dwelling place is with men now. And then Jesus of Nazareth was raised from the dead, and ascended into heaven. And ANY man who believes in Him will be made a co-heir of His inheritance, and a partaker in the Spirit of the Living God. He saves porn addicts. He saves those who reject his name. And more than that He transforms them into a new being not of this world, but of His coming kingdom. He's not about debating and arguing for His place of glory. He died to have that spot. And what do you do? What do we all do? We say that He didn't exist. We say science is God. We say we are God. Well, science hasn't brought anyone back from the dead. And I guarantee you that science isn't going to have an answer for when He cracks the sky.
"Human Beings are Gods." You might want to take that paper crown off your head, cause the real King is coming back, and He's not sharing His glory. Every knee will bow, every tongue will praise Him. And everyone will be judged for what they have done. And if Christ hasn't eaten Your judgement, then it's gonna be dumped on Your plate.
Seriously, look at nature more closely.
If now sex was created by something, homosexuality was also created, aswell as the mind even being able produce sexual fantasies. Then that means all of these things are actually a part of humanity. Whatever you may think, homosexuality is actually something rather common in nature, especially among primates such as ourselves.
It's somewhat of nature's own way of birthcontrol.
Aswell as to the statement you were answering, I would say God is just something humans made up a long time ago to explain things like feelings or how the world came to be. Which to me seems pretty naive to believe in this day and age, it just seems like people are not willing to open their eyes. Because if you think about it, if humans created God(which they obviously did), then we are Meta-Gods which means we're more powerful than God could ever be. This shows through us being able to not accept God as truth, which is something that means that we could kill God's influence over mankind, therefore we're more godlike than God himself.
This might seem somewhat over the top philosophic but that's exactly what religion is, philosophy with a touch of fanaticm. (Just my five cents).
Masturbation or pornography is not an act of sin or evil
hahahha wow I sure wish that were true. Perhaps you are right, masturbation or porn is not a sin; unless you look at it and do it. of course the topic of conversation is controlling masturbation so uh yah....
1 Peter 4:1-2 (NIV) Therefore, since Christ suffered in his body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because he who has suffered in his body is done with sin. As a result, he does not live the rest of his earthly life for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God.
Eph 5:3 (NIV) But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people.
Thank goodness porn is not related to sexual immortality or impurity. Whewww. hahahhahaha. all the porn I have seen is clean. LOL
Matt 5:28-29 (NIV) [Jesus:] "But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell."
Yah so uh huh Masturbation or pornography is not a sin - yes, according to an atheist. but if you believe in Jesus Christ - the Bible clearly states the truth!
Day 4
I've been an addict for the last 20 years and trying again to quit.
Day 4 has been absolutely horrible. :(
I can't believe its only been 4 days and how bad the withdrawal symptoms are.
Anybody know how to manage these difficult days? Serotonin pills? Vitamin C?
Help!
'all men watch porn' is the
'all men watch porn' is the most absurdly ridiculous statement i've ever hear anyone make.
My experience
I feel my brain drained out after 1-2 hours of porn. Moreover, after a while, masturbation over porn becomes inevitable. I am not religious and am rather anti-religious. But this problem is among both religious and non-religious people. It's not related to the beliefs. One might fall on the ground even if he/she does believe he might get dirty!! Religious people find themselves shameful in front of their respective God, and non-religious ones find themselves guilty in front of themselves, their visions, wife, etc.. This adds up to the pressure and to escape it one finds porn the instant relief again!
Adding the drainage resulting from masturbation that will eventually accompany porn, it is devastating. I often miss classes in the univesity for I cannot get up soon in the morning. Porn and masturbation are both joyful but draining. That's why watching it eventually BECOMES addiction in your hard times in life.
It takes one's will to life. Will to win. It takes your will and gives you a little plessure and space to escape.
How to deal with it??
I love porn. I love masturbating. I've done it since I was 15. But now I have a woman in my life I can see how much of a waste it really is. I want to save myself for her.... and I love how she makes my cock throb so much more than watching a porn movie.
I've realised that real sex involves a proper connection of mind body and soul. I also believe that masturbating can actually dissolve your mind body and soul when abused. It's ok for some stress relief, once a week or so. But i think it really draws from your body. It leaves you faded. the hormnoes just fry your brain and you feel dazed and over dopamined.
I want to know if there is some sort of counter balance. Is there a supplement hormone that can counter balance the act of over stimulation from porn???? Like Methadone for the Crack Head. Because I think porn really can have that much of a dramatic effect on someone. It can literally warp your mind!!
My soon to be husband is addicted to porn
I have been pain behind this situation for 4 years now. I have talked to him and he says it will stop. I have found all kinds of porn, from adult, to animal, to teen, and kid porn on everything that gets internet in my house. The computer has a ton, Itouch, cell phones, constant mags with celebs , and when he thinks i'm sleeping I see him even on the tv trying to look at everything he can info merchials on weight loss, bra commercials, anything to where there is alot of skin showing. It is driving me crazy, now i', at the point where i dont even enjoy sex with him because i know he is not having sex in his mind with me. I feel ugly, old, fat, and not attractive at all. I see men look at me now and feel i look so ugly thats why there looking. It has made me depressed and sad all the time. I cant even think about anything else. I also noticed he is getting coffee with expresso shots 3 at a time in a small before work along wih energy drinks constantly. Does that have anything to do with it also? Please help.
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