The Worst Disease You Can Get: Fatal Familial Insomnia and the I-Function

AnnaM's picture

Pierluigi Gambetti, one of the discoverers of the condition known as fatal familial insomnia (FFI), claims that it is "the worst disease you can get." (5) Given the vast number of diseases in the world, Gambetti's claim seems farfetched at first glance, maybe even selfish; who wouldn't want to take credit for discovering one of the worst diseases in the world? But a quick overview of the disease presents solid evidence in favor of the claim- and some interesting insights about the many tasks of the I-function.

FFI has been discovered in only 28 families worldwide; it is an autosomal dominant gene mutation, meaning that a parent with the disease has a fifty percent chance of passing it on to his or her child (2). That much is predictable. But every other aspect of the disease is wildly unpredictable, forcing family members to make difficult decisions. If parents have such a high chance of passing on the disease, one might ask, why don't they simply choose not to have children? The answer: FFI , unlike many other fatal genetic conditions, doesn't appear until the victim is middle-aged, and tests to see whether parents carry the FFI mutation only recently became available (1). Here the first questions of the I-function, and the first paradoxes of the disease, appear. If this disease occurred in childhood, natural selection would have long ago done away with it. Because it does not strike until middle age, however, parents who may be carriers must make difficult decisions about childbirth. Paradoxically, it is in the parents' best interest to have more children, in order to ensure that at least some live FFI free into old age. More children, however, also means more potential FFI cases- a tough paradox for the I-function to work through.

Next, the symptoms. FFI baffled investigators for years, because certain symptoms resemble encephalitis, end-stage alcoholism, and dementia, among other conditions (1). But the hallmark of FFI, which the aforementioned conditions don't necessarily show, is the complete inability to sleep. The brain wave patterns that appear on FFI patients' EEGs go up and down wildly, in a pattern completely unlike the normal sleep-wake cycle; they may still show patterns indicative of REM sleep at night, but they do not pass through the sleep stages that typically precede REM, and they can still move while in the REM stage (5). There are also unbelievable highs in pulse and blood pressure, excessive sweating and an eventual loss of coordination and other gross motor skills (including speech) before the victim finally falls into a coma-like state and dies (1). But, most horribly, the thinking portions of the I-function remain intact, even as the rest of the body deteriorates (4). Because FFI is invariably fatal, patients understand that they will die, can talk and write freely about their coordination deteriorates and understand their fate up until their death (5). Some diseases, like Alzheimer's disease, are tragic because their victims lose the ability to describe their decline; in these diseases, the I-function deteriorates along with the physical body. But FFI is tragic for precisely the opposite reason; it leaves the I-function intact, even when its victims are clearly in physical agony.

Even the agent that causes FFI defies conventions. It is a prion, a form of infectious protein. Humans naturally produce thousands of intricately folded proteins, and the vast majority of them are harmless. But if one protein happens to misfold in a harmful way, it can trigger a chain reaction, leading other proteins to produce similarly harmful forms; the immune system cannot counteract the chain, since it does not see the proteins as infectious agents (4). The exact mechanisms behind this process, and the reasons why it should be fatal, aren't well understood. The effects of prions on the brains of FFI victims, however, are well-documented. In most areas of the brain, FFI victims show remarkably little damage. The thalamus, however, is utterly destroyed, full of holes (3). Given this evidence, one might try to make the argument that the I-function cannot be located in the thalamus; after all, FFI victims remain completely able to think and comprehend the world, even as the prions destroy that part of the brain. However, the I-function isn't limited to one section of the brain, and it does not only control thinking and speech. Indeed the sleep-wake cycle, so damaged in FFI victims, is also regulated in part by the I-function; people simply tend to forget this fact, because sleep feels like such a natural part of our existence. Only in unusual cases, like the severe insomnia of FFI, do we remember the I-function's role in this cycle.

FFI, then, presents yet another example of why it's useless to try to pin down one precise area where the I-function lies. One can see from FFI victims that the parts of the I-function that have to do with language use and comprehension, with naming people and objects in the world, probably aren't located in the thalamus. But the thalamus must play some role in the sleep-wake cycle, judging from FFI victims' brain damage, and the I-function aids in sleep-wake cycles as well; one cannot give an exact location for a function that performs so many diverse tasks.

 

Web Sources:

1) Case Study: Fatal Familial Insomnia; Location: Venice, Italy; To Sleep No More

2) Dying for Sleep: Researchers Track the Cause of a Rare but Fatal form of Insomnia

3) Fatal Familial Insomnia

4) Biofundamentals: Protein Folding and Turnover

Non-Web Source:

1) The Family That Couldn't Sleep: A Medical Mystery, by D.T. Max. Random House Publications, New York, 2006.

Comments

Serendip Visitor's picture

My friend's mother was

My friend's mother was genetically linked to this disease. She passed away two years ago in April. God has nothing to do with it.. You must understand that there is no God that can stop this disease. She believed in God and prayed but she knew that she was going to die. There's no use in clinging onto idols who'll only drag you down like anchors..

Kim crutchfield's picture

Ffl

Im suffering with it

kim's picture

to the preacher

I believe in Jesus Christ, in the name of the Lord and the Holy Spirit. But I had a head injury in 02. I know I don't have FFI. But it feels like it. I don't sleep without meds. Trust me I have prayed with all my friends. Don't criticize.

Gurlygirl2012@aol.com's picture

Sorry about your head injury

Sorry about your head injury :( do you obey Jesus?

Serendip Visitor's picture

gluten intolerance and gmos

i think gmos are to blame for this disorder. it only happens in genetically susceptible individuals, but it also can affect one member of a family but not others. i believe this is because of varying factors. personally my parents have no food allergies but i suffer debilitated by them now. they began several years ago at around age 28. i am sure i am going to die. everytime i have a cramping constipating diarea flare up, i get insomnia that lasts days. it makes you just want to die.

parasites caused from gmos and bacterial imbalances and all that also contribute to debilitating insomnia. i do not realy believe in this 'genetic insomnia' ala fatal familial insomnia. there are simpler explanations and we are potentially all susceptible. it is a screwd up era we live in. when ive gone to the hospital in these kinds of states they just send me home. they wont do crap for insomnia even if its life threatening. i hate doctors. i have lost all hope. i wish i was rich enough to afford alternative medicine, but theres just no way. if you are rich, i highly recommend seeking out alternative medical help. there is alot that can be done.

good luck. i hope i make it through this flare up. :( heh.

freddo's picture

I'd suggest the hitchhikers

I'd suggest the hitchhikers guide. don't panic.

Chris Edwards's picture

Brain Disease

Months ago I stopped eating properly and spent day after day sleeping continuously. I lost the ability to function properly and my brain seemed to stop working. My thinking was not affected, but I am unable to perform normal everyday tasks such as washing myself or using the washing machine . I was sent home from work last july because I could no longer perform tasks I have been doing for over 40 years. I am sure that the part of my brain that gives me direction on everyday tasks has been destroyed. I have not slept at all in months and my brain won't let me enter the sleep mode and I just lay in bed with eyes shut but remain conscious and awake throughout the night. I have lost loads of weight and have noticed both my sense of smell and taste have deminished considerably to the point that I can no longer appreciate the taste of food chocolate or cigarettes. I just wish someone would take my symptoms seriously and not consider this to be a mental problem. I have seen the psychiatrist and given the drugs a go but the problem keeps getting worse. I know that parts of my brain have been damaged and can never recover. I can't function as a person anymore and just wish I was dead.

Kara Cohen's picture

Sporadic fatal insomnia

Hi. I just read your post and I completely understand what you are going through. I have Sporadic Fatal Insomnia and nobody believes me. I've been awake since last August and it's so awful and scary. I know I'm going to die and I'm just so scared all the time. Over this past year, I've become a Christian and have been baptized and tried respenting of all my sins. I'm having a very hard time with this illness and understanding God. I must live by faith because I can't feel things and I used to feel God all the time although I pushed him away prior to this disease and lived a life of sin. We need God and that's it. There's no other cure or help that matters. I'm homeless, staying with my dad sometimes and a Christian family the rest of the time. This disease makes me feel so alone and unwanted. I lost all emotion mostly, never feel any happiness, only sadness for myself which is bad because I feel like I've lost the complete ablility to love and connect. Please help us God. If you ever want somebody to talk to, please call me at 615-955-1447. Let's continue to pray together.

Olafur From Iceland's picture

I guess I'm the odd one out

Good night guys time for my nightly 7-8 hour sleep.

zZzZzZzZzZzZzZzzZzzZzZZzzz

luke's picture

insomnia on the way out

I am getting worst with the insomnia I can feel my body is shutting down I'm on the way out
I feel what a waste of a life. I can't do anything. It's either me drop dead or just suicide which I am leaning towards
other parts of the body is n Po t function well. Anyone got suggestions?
Doctors are hopeless. I am losing my faith as well.

Serendip Visitor's picture

Re: insomnia on the way out

I hear you are in pain. You need to talk to someone right away. Call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) (the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline)

Barbara Teittinen's picture

ffi

Do you know where I can get tested for this disease?
I live in nh.near mass. Thanks.

Jerry Hufford's picture

fatal familial insomnia

I think I have this disease. I can't sleep at all. My body is wasting away. Can someone help me, I've tried drs. And thier pills. Nothing worked.

luke's picture

insomnia

Hi I can relate to that too.
Insomnia. I have tried pills after pills.
Other parts of my body not working well.
sometimes I feel that one day I may just take my own life away.

Gurlygirl2012@aol.com's picture

Luke, can you please contact

Luke, can you please contact me if you would like at my email address above. I would like to talk with you.

Gurlygirl2012@aol.com's picture

Jerry, please contact me also

Jerry, please contact me also

kim's picture

I finally started sleeping:)

I finally started sleeping:) celexa and xanax with 3 beers. Works for me. God bless you all and try to sleep ♡

Anon's picture

LOL

Randomly came accross this article and I'm not gonna lie, these comments are entertaining.
1) If you have the disease mentioned, you will DIE. If you have no family history of the disease; YOU DON'T HAVE IT. It's genetic. You can't catch it like a cold.
2) If every doctor you've seen thinks you need to see a psyciatrist and that you're mentally unstable, you probably are.
3) Jesus won't save you from shit. It's a genetic disease that you're born with.
Not meaning to be a negative nancy but this article has been almost ruined by all the uneducated, poorly punctuated comments below it.

MElastiGirl's picture

Finally!

Thank you! I generally feel bad for the ignorant, but these comments just can't hide the crazy. I have a rare genetic disorder, too--thankfully not this one. I am, however, a raging insomniac. It's true that it is impossible to go months without sleeping without dying, hence the word "fatal" in this disease's name. It is not a curse, and you can't pray it away. To my fellow insomniacs who have posted... You are likely getting small "microsleeps" or you would be dead already. For those of you who keep invoking Jesus, please name one person you know (and I mean a real person you have met) who has been cured of a genetic disorder through prayer--yours or anyone else's. It is cruel to suggest to people who are suffering from an incurable disease that they have brought this on through some brand of sinful behavior. Shame on you! Have you ever read any book other than the bible?

Serendip Visitor's picture

God can heal this disease. He

God can heal this disease. He can do anything. Jesus has healed people, got people of their meds, off drugs, I even heard of Him healing a person of HIV before. HIV is known to not have a medical cure right? So how can this be explained? "Genetic" diseases are from generational sins from the person's ancestors, the curse came down the family line.. That's why they are born with it.. it's just the truth. The medical industry and the world has been pushing its lies about disease and the use of medication so people just think its true, the devil doesn't want people to know that Jesus can heal them of anything but they will have to follow Him to recieve His blessings. I don't want anyone to have to go through the misery of any disease and doctors and medications.. Jesus can heal anything. If a person chooses not to believe that then they have made their choice. If you would like to see my testimony about how I can to Jesus and how he healed me, please YouTube search: Chris Lasala Paige
The video should come up. Be blessed.

Gurlygirl2012@aol.com's picture

Anon, Jesus can heal anyone

Anon, Jesus can heal anyone of anything. Those who lack faith deny the power of God. This disease may seem "genetic" but it is only "genetic" because it is a curse that has come down the family line due to past sins or an actual curse that someone has put on the person and their descendants. You don't have to believe me, I know what the truth is. Why would you think God, the creator of you and me and this entire planet- everything, could not cure something like this... It is easy for Him to do, a person just has to get in line with His will.... And if it is His will, He will heal them... If you seek Jesus, you will find the truth.
Be blessed.

kim's picture

jesus

Look guest,
I had a head injury in 02 ever since than I don't sleep. I know I don't have FFI but I can empathise with those who do. I know it's very rare. I prayed for years to sleep. I am a Christian :) but have many medical problems too. Just a few i have 3 kidneys along with three adrenaline glands, a tumor on the putitry gland, plus many more. I take my meds and I sleep finially.

Serendip Visitor's picture

If you seek Jesus, you will find what is already there you moron

I am in High school Biology and I understand the way genetics work from the smallest level possible (With still being smart, of course) This article was great in that it backed up it's sources. Can your Bible back up it's sources? An actual curse?? An. actual. curse. Okay, you go fly back to the Middle Ages and I will stay here enjoying my knowledge. I can't believe people actually live like this in the world and because it is so incredulous I had to make this comment. As Bill Nye once said "SCIENCE RULES"

Pastafari's picture

*FacePalm*

Knowing the truth and believing in something are two far different things, sorry. I know The Flying Spaghetti Monster watches over the Earth and that is fact. Believe as you wish and take care!

Serendip Visitor's picture

If you guys want to not

If you guys want to not believe in Jesus and that He can heal you from insomnia and are not even open to the idea then how can I help you? Why do people want to stay in their misery when they can be free? Why not even give Him a chance to heal you? If He is not real then why did I get healed by Him and got free from using all my meds when my doctor said if I got off my meds the symptoms would come back..... How can science explain that?

Sukanta Debnath's picture

I have no Idea wether I have Insomnia or I think like that

I was sleepless for a month due to too much negative thinking on diseases so naturally I lost my mind I turned violent due to lack
of sleep I can sill remember those my rough days In Hospital then I was diagnoised by a Psychatrist then I got a real relief he did inject me a kind of Injection which sent me to deep sleep for continue 2 days. I am okay now but still sometimes I get depressed due to lot of tension I cant sleep well on daily basis but I discovered myself that if I make myself bussy in something I feel sleepy I get slept for more than 7 hours in a day. its been 7 years now I don't take any Pills or medications. Because sleeping tablets can let you go to sleep but it makes your Insomnia more worser even I heard sleeping pills are not good for male because they have a lots of health side-affects so I don't rely on pills but I researched on sleep that there is a few chemicals in our brain which promotes & maintain our sleep & good mood one is Tryptophan & Serotonin. probably you guys can take Red meat, pea nut, spinach, cheez, Milk before go to bed & brown Rice in your diet which will help you to give these two necessary chemicals or Amino Acids. I heard Turkey meat is a good meal which will make you fall in asleep because its rich in one chemical Tryptophan. One more thing if you get depressed very often my suggestion would be for you always try to sit under Sun light because during night our body produces one Enzymes or chemicall called Melatonin which helps to make us fall in sleep so yeah... Warning : Before you take my advice for granted do your own research too & I won't be Responsible for your problem later & Thanks. You can email me because Its just to explore the knowledge & share my story & Real History of my Sleeping Diagnosed & problem. My Email : sukanta.debnath.it2@gmail.com & May God bless & help everyone who is not getting sleep properly & for those who is suffering from FFI Amen !!! Love you All

Niall Hutton's picture

You don't have FFI

If you had FFI, you would be dead by now. It usually takes 7 to 36 months to die from it and the disease develops with four stages:

1) increasing insomnia, resulting in panic attacks, paranoia and phobias. This lasts for about 4 months.
2) hallucinations and panic attacks become more noticeable. This lasts for about 5 months.
3) Complete inability to sleep along with rapid weight loss for about 3 months.
4) Dementia is the final progression of the disease, lasting for 6 months until the patient dies.

These times are all averages, but you definitely don't have it. If you did, all those sleeping pills and barbiturates wouldn't help you at all, in fact if you have FFI they are more likely to worsen your symptoms, oddly.

(NB. FFI is not just hereditary; random mutations can occur at any point and you can get it, but it is extremely unlikely.)

Serendip Visitor's picture

My doctors have all given up

My doctors have all given up on me... I feel like i could have this but maybe i'm over thinking. My insomnia is geting progressively worse. Sleeping pills exacerbate things, i'm sweaty, chest stagnant paints, my brain feels like a old sponge. My memory is cutting out, speech is variable... excessive stage 1 sleep if any sleep at all and almost no delta.... the only thing different is that I had this over the course of 14 years... and i'm at the end of my rope... is there a way to get tested for this?

Serendip Visitor's picture

not able tosleep

last couple weeks no sleep noinsurance total stressed out don't know what to do help ! thanks mike

Serendip Visitor's picture

If anyone thinks they have

If anyone thinks they have this, they should try the paleolithic or vegan diet with no refined carbohydrates or processed foods. The chemicals in such foods can be harmful to us and there is the simple fact that many of these foods are not designed to be beneficial to us. Corn, no longer natural is a gmo that is found in almost every processed food. I know people that have become cured from serious health problems by going off these foods. You should research it.

Richard Smart's picture

Prion diseases

I think that prion diseases are the worst type of disease extant today. They are absolutely horrible, totally un-treatable, and always fatal. I lost a friend to familial CJD a couple of years ago, and it was terrible watching him suffer and eventually die from it, absolutely heart-breaking. Perhaps if it does transpire that there is an as-yet unidentified mass epidemic of variant CJD dormant in British people, a cure will be found, but until one is, prion diseases are a death sentence, and a horrible way to die.

Holly's picture

FFI

I don't mean to be rude, but fatal familial insomnia does not have a cure or even a treatment. If you have it, you will die 100% of the time. Going in a diet is not going to change that. Please stop trying to diagnose yourselves - FFI occurs in less than 1 in 30 million people, it's inherited, it's 100% fatal, and it's only been found in about 40 families around the world. Odds are that you have something else.

And please stop spreading misinformation about this disease, like "Try the paleolithic diet, chemicals in food make people sick!". It has nothing to do with food. FFI is a fatal degenerative prion disease that is completely unrelated to diet.

Kara Cohen's picture

fatal insomnia

I have fatal insomnia. I haven't slept in nearly 8 months, brain/body burn, psychotic, confused, apathetic, went through early menopause at 38. Unfortunately, I'm broke and don't have medical insurance. I live in Nashville, 'TN with my father who just thinks I'm mentally ill. That's not the case. I stopped sleeping in July. Is it true that changing your diet can cure you of fatal insomnia? Please explain this more to me. Thank you.

Serendip Visitor's picture

hello kara

Kara ,please call me i will try my best to help you witj the right info,ive been threw all this and barely sleep or normally. Seven eight six four nime nine eight six seven five. Heather.

Serendip Visitor's picture

Kara, Jesus can heal you, I'm

Kara, Jesus can heal you, I'm not lying, He is real! He will heal you, just give your life to Him and live for Him not sin. email me: Gurlygirl2012@aol.com

I know the unexplainable torture it is to not sleep night after night, Jesus can heal you, please believe me everyone, it is true!!! He healed me! I know how desperate and scared all of you are...please come to Jesus, he is the only one who can truly heal you and that is the truth!

Serendip Visitor's picture

hi

Kara,do you sleep at all please tell me all your,symptoms ive been to three doctors no one knows whats wrong with me.I can try to help diagnose you. Ive spoke to alot of doctors,prion disease does come with other symptoms .Tell me everything your experiencing.

Serendip Visitor's picture

hi karen

Please tell me im the same way ,do u twilight sleep?

Serendip Visitor's picture

hi karen

I can relate 100% how you feel Karen. My dad thinks im mentally ill as well. I spoke with someexsperts about prion disease , they told me prion disease has other symptoms like problems with balance, in canada there is free health care but i hate american doctors they never even diagnosed me , so no one knows why. One doctor told me it can be high orexin levels,but that is a test that requires spinal fluid but they r not doing that test.

Kara Cohen's picture

fatal insomnia

Yes. Thank you for replying. It's not mental illness. It's hard not having any health insurance and I do have problems with balance as well. My body and brain burn profusely. It's so scary. Do you have this disease as well? It's so difficult to get a diagnosis. I found some phone numbers on prionalliance.org and I will call tomorrow. I'm very scared and need guidance. I am dying and can't get a grip. Need help!!

Serendip Visitor's picture

hi kara

Did you find anyone to help ,what did the prion alliance say

Serendip Visitor's picture

hi kara

I dont carry the genetic , but i think the sporadic. Doctors think im menrally ill but why when i lay down im so tired but dont sleep only this wierd dream like state in small sessions.tell me kara more you will.have to call me so i can try to diagnose you , im not a doctor but i have soooo much education on this from my symptoms going to horrible nuerologists with my crap ass insurance,here in florida but i spome with alot of exsperts.please call me

Serendip Visitor's picture

Ffi.

I don't know if I have this but I haven't been able to sleep in the past four months I am scared. I have five children that needs me. I don't know what to do anymore. I pray and pray and read my bible

gurlygirl's picture

Also if you cant sleep by

Also if you cant sleep by obeying God alone, then you need deliverance too!

gurlygirl's picture

Listen everyone... I feel

Listen everyone... I feel your pain, i couldnt hardly sleep at all for 5 months.. I eventually had to go on medication to go to sleep. It worked but i didnt like taking medication and i felt like a slave. Now i am free of medicine and I can sleep at night. This happenee because i gave my life to Jesus and I obeyed Him and He healed me. God will heal you if you make Jesus the lord and savior of your life. That means making Him number one, tuning away from all willful sin and letting your old self pretty much die. Your whole life must be given to Jesus. I know this may sound hard but it is worth it and God will heal you. I know how desperate you can be to want to sleep. I know the reason why everyone cant sleep but im not going to say it right now. If anyone needs information on how to follow Jesus correctly please email me. He will heal you and you will sleep but you must give up your sins and your old ways. Be blessed everyone!!

Kara Cohen's picture

fatal insomnia

Hi there. I desperately need God's help. Thank you for responding and caring. I'm in excruciating pain. Brain and body burn like crazy!! Nobody believes me or cares really. Doctors don't even know what this disease is. I really need your help and could use spiritual help and guidance. Thank you. I don't know how to email you but you can call me as well at

Kara Cohen's picture

fatal insomnia

I know I have this disease and there's nothing I can do about it but wait to die. I'm petrified. I haven't slept in nearly 8 months, went through early menopause at 38, brain and body burns all day and night, can't detect temps, apathetic, psychotic and more. I lost everything these past 2 years and now I live isolated with my father in Nashville TN with no health insurance. I read what you posted about G d and Jesus. I completely understand. I want to do that and don't know how...just give my entire life to Jesus. I've lived a very sinful life and I believe that this disease is a form of punishment for my dreadful sins. Can G d forgive me? Can he heal me? I really need help and spiritual guidance. I'm very fearful of death and this disease will kill me. Thank you so much and I appreciate all the spiritual guidance you have to offer. You may email me back at Thank you so much!!

Gurlygirl2012@aol.com's picture

And remember to tell God that

And remember to tell God that you receive Jesus now as your lord and savior and to please wash you from all your sins and make you clean and to please save you. Then walk with Jesus. you have to walk with Jesus and live for Jesus to be saved and no longer live for sin. :)

Gurlygirl2012@aol.com's picture

Also stop cursing...

Also stop cursing...

Gurlygirl2012@aol.com's picture

Hi Kara, I can't see your

Hi Kara, I can't see your email...the name I am using is my email I hope you can see it, yes, God will forgive you definitely... he loves you so much! He has forgiven me and I have done stuff im not proud of... God has even forgiven murderers, He will forgive everyone who will follow His son and accept His gift of salvation.

This is what you need to do, you need to get a king James bible. Start reading it from the New Testament all the way to the end, everything in there will tell you what you need to do to please God...Then read the new testament again and then read the bible from the beginning. You basically have to stop living for sin and start living only for Jesus.

You must stop taking all drugs..all of them. if you are on prescription drugs, you must wean off 25% over 2-3 weeks depending on the drugs. No smoking, don't even drink alcohol at this point.

You must stop all willful sins, there are many of them in the bible but I'm just going to name some that I had to give up or just some common ones lust- lusting after men- I had to stop watching all romance because of lust, no romance books, no looking at men with lust, no gossiping- you are only allowed to make righteous judgement on people if you yourself is righteous, don't talk badly about other people, masterbation, no porn, all sexual sin, you must stop having all sex, no sex allowed unless you are married, stop watching or reading anything that has magic in it or the occult..vampires, witches, anything with magic in it, even if it is Disney movies, it is not good. Don't read your horoscopes, don't do yoga, don't do accupuncture, karate- I know this sounds wierd but there is a reason why you have to stop doing all that,
Stop lying altogether, put no idols before God, this means that if you like doing anything and spending more time on it then God, you have made it an idol, you don't have to give up good clean hobbies but you can't put them before God, you can't be addicted to anything- you can't be addicted to sugar, anything pretty much, honor your mother and your father and respect them. No drugs at all, you must give them all up. Don't act out on your anger. be of a gentle and meek spirit. love everyone and this is very very important, you must forgive everyone, forgive them, if you don't forgive everyone God will not forgive you.

Now even when you stop sinning willfully you will still have accidental sins of the heart, like jealousies, anger, rage, hatred, ect.. As long as you walk in repentence for sins and stop sinning willfully, these sins are forgiven- you can even have a conversation with God in your head when you get any bad thoughts and just say sorry but all these accidental sins, like impure thoughts are forgiven, but when you get the thoughts try not to give them power. Basically we obey God with all this stuff to show Him we love Him and to thank Him for giving us another chance and bringing Jesus to die on the cross for us.

As long as you try with 100% effort to not sin willfully and be righteous and holy and deny yourself everyday..this means you are living for God, you are no longer living for sin and you will be saved. And at first it will be really hard probably but just keep on fighting and it will get easier. When you are living for God like this, you might sin willfully, just say sorry and try really hard not to do it again, He forgives you. When you start living for God, ask Him for the Holy Spirit, He will help you in your walk with Jesus, the Holy Spirit is like having God live inside of you. it is a gift which gives you eternal life if you stay on the path of walking with Jesus and living with Jesus.

also pray over all the food you eat. say Father, please wash this food in the blood of Jesus, in Jesus' name. thank you for it. Amen.

I want you to look up Chris Lasala online. he has many YouTube videos about God and how to follow Jesus. he might scare you a little because He doesn't focus on God's love as much but he helped me get off my medications. He has a video about how to get off medications correctly. he has a website: attacking Satan in Jesus Name.. You can email Him if you want to.
he will help you. I am sure Jesus will heal you, don't worry. God heals everyone if it is His will and He makes sure that His children are in good health.

You just really have to stop willfully sinning. And I'm so sorry that I havent gotten back to you till now! I just looked at the website again today, I know the torture of not sleeping, I know how horrible it is and my heart goes out to you, don't worry anymore. pray to God and say, God, I know that through my obedience and faith in you, you will heal me. you show your faith and love to God by obeying Him. Jesus said..if you love me, keep my commandments.

All this stuff you are going to learn about what is really going on in the world is going to freak you out but you need to know the truth. you might need deliverance too you probably do and Chris lasala can help you with that. I will pray for you and I hope everything goes well. email me! Don't worry, you will feel relief, you will sleep again, Jesus can cure anything. He is real, God is real!
Love,
Paige

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The Truth About Jesus

When God's own son Jesus died for ALL sins and rose again it means he died for ALL sins. when he appeared to the 11 he told them he was going back to the Father but would send a helper, The Holy Spirit. When we believe that Jesus died for our sins and ask him to be our LORD and SAVIOR we become a new creation. This is the process by which Jesus told Nicodemus on how to be Born Again. The Bible says that we have entered into a covenant of grace by which sin no longer has dominion over us because of the grace given by our lord Jesus. The first covenant "The Law" was given by moses and is called the ministry of death written on tablets of stones. For those that know Jesus we are no longer under he covenant of the law but under the covenant of grace. What is grace? its GOds gift of unmerited favor. In other words no matter how hard you try you can't keep the Law. The concept of willfully sinning is silly because since we have free choice all sin is willful. Now when you realize that the bible is true in saying that we all have fallen short and breaking one law makes us guilty of the whole law in which case the penalty is eternal separation from GOD. When we realize that GOD loves us enough to put on our sin and give us his righteousness we can then trust that he will truly finish the work he started in us. Notice I said HE, trying to be better doe nothing to make you better in fact it is actually counterproductive. But when we let go and allow the HOLY SPIRIT to do its job in making us into what he wants then is when we get better. Whats the difference? you vs GOD. Mankind was never supposed to be able to keep the law, the law was supposed to do what it was created to do, make us realize we can't keep it and we need a savior. It is by his stripes we are healed not our obedience.In fact as Moses led the Jewish nation out of egypt they constantly sinned, murmured, complained and GOD responded with grace not punishment and not 1 person died. It was only when they said they wanted to be judged by there own actions then the law was given and on that day GOD told the people not to even come near him on the mountain. The day the law was given 3000 people died, fast forward to the day of Pentecost and the indwelling of the HOLY Spirit 3000 people were saved. In short there are 2 covenants, The Law or Grace. Jesus loved us all that he gave us all the grace we need.
Remember he died for ALL sin not just the ones you did before you got saved. There is only 1 Gospel and its that a loving GOD died for a fallen mankind because of love. Why in the world would you get saved from the LAW then go back to it. Just focus on Jesus and he will take care of the rest. As far as wether or not GOD will choose to heal a disease is up to him, prayer helps but Gods will is his will. We can take the best comfort in knowing that this brief life we live is just the beginning of an eternity with God, or we can trust in ourselves and hear the truly most frightening words we could ever hear, I never knew you, depart from me you who work iniquity. The choice is yours but leave the work to him. GOD BLESS

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