Tired

Hummingbird's picture

I'm beginning to feel all written out – and we're not even halfway through the semester. I suppose, mostly, it's because I feel like my voice has been overused of late. When I'm not speaking, my blog posts are speaking for me. When I'm staying silent in class, I'm still, somehow, making a statement. I feel as though I'm never truly silent. Sommer talks a lot about silence as a way "ethnic" writers draw a line and mark where they need to be respected. Rigoberta says, "I'm still keeping secret what I think no-one should know," and reminds us who really has the power in her novel. But I feel we're not doing enough of that in our classroom. Last week, HSBurke said she thought it was ironic that in a class about silence we were "ALL SO LOUD." I agree. As I work on becoming a better listener, I want to also work on being a better person of silence. During our lunch meeting on Friday, when icouldntthinkofanoriginalname mentioned that she felt we shouldn't feel pressured to speak about personal topics, but that there is value in sharing, I wondered the opposite. Isn't there also value in not sharing?

I'd like to follow the lead of Jesusa Palancares, quoted in Sommer's introduction, "Advertencia/Warning" and simply say, "Fuck off, now. Go away and let me sleep."

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Michaela's picture

As exhausted as I often feel

As exhausted as I often feel by these classes, I feel as though I'd rather know more about others, hear their thoughts, than shut it out in seeking silence. We spend time being silent together in Anne's class every meeting, but I find that, although Anne doesn't want us to necessarily spend time discussing it afterwards, it doesn't have much meaning for me otherwise. Maybe it's just because my introspection feels limited in a class where so much of what I'm interested is what you all have to say, your stories and thoughts and feelings, but I really do see the value in sharing our stories--as much as we hope to not judge one another based on our backgrounds, I wish I had a level of context that we haven't yet reached, at least so that we can better understand where our points of view come from. 

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